We Are Not Our Scars

I had an interesting conversation yesterday with a woman who was in charge of the testing I had to have done at the hospital. She was young, mid 30’s and so personable that of course, we got to talking. You know how we are put in meet-cutes for a reason, right? Well, this one was meant to be. (OK, correction – I just learned that meet-cutes are for romance. This was not for romance. But it was a friendship connection!)

I won’t bore you with all of the details, but I will share a bit with you as she was concerned about her scars. As you may know, I have many physical scars, having endured more than 15 surgeries thus far. I am not ashamed that the blank canvas I was given at birth is riddled with all types of surgical scars, the most recent being a foot long starting at the top of my ribcage going right down the middle of my chest from open heart surgery a year ago. While the other scars I may be able to somewhat hide, this one is difficult to hide, so I don’t. Why should I when it’s a part of me? It’s part of the history of my broken heart now mended. A testament to being able to shine again and to have overcome, once again, another earthly struggle. It’s also a cautionary tale because I was born with a deformed aortic valve that I never knew existed and it was never picked up during any of my prior surgeries for breast cancer etc.

This woman was having a difficult time with her scar because it felt traumitizing to her. She had disassociated from that part of her body in order to keep going. I understand that happens and once we started talking about it, there was so much to say. So much to listen to that she needed someone to just sit and understand. A caring ear that didn’t judge, but instead got it, because she’d been there. It was such a precious few moments shared and I was so honored that she felt safe enough to talk with me about her feelings and open up. I love when what I’ve experienced can be helpful to someone else’s situation and we can connect.

We ended up hugging a few times which always makes me smile because I am a HUGE HUGGER! I told her that she could reach out to me because my number’s on my paperwork if she wanted to chat again. I have had so many angels in my life who took the time to care about me that I always try to pass it along, because that’s what we do! We connect…we are all humans…that’s just the beginning of the connection.

So today as you’re going about your day, notice those around you. Smile at them. You never know how much a smile can mean to someone else. Listen more than you speak as you will hear the most amazing stories told from those who need a caring friend. Life is short. Make the most of today…

Shine On!

xo

Life Is In The Little Things We Do

I am not a person who goes to Starbucks very often.  That being said, the other day it was warm out and I decided to treat myself so I pulled into the drive thru of a local Starbucks for a mocha frappuccino.

In our busy world of fast food, there’s a routine that’s fairly consistent.  We pull up to speak our order to the person behind the screen.  Then we pull around to the window, pay for our order, then wait in line to pull to the next window to receive what we’ve ordered.

Easy.  Routine.  Expected.

So when I pulled up to order at the Starbucks screen I heard:

“Good afternoon.  Welcome to Starbucks.  How may I begin your order today?”

At first I was a bit astonished because I’m so used to the voice at the other end of the screen being a bit frazzled and curt.  Yet her voice was soothing, patient and happy.

“Good afternoon!  I’d like a medium (or whatever you call that size) mocha frappuccino please and that’s it.”

“Of course.  What a perfect treat for a sunny day!  Please pull around to the window.”

“Ok, thank you.”

I put my car into drive and moved to the window.  As I rolled up to the Starbucks’ window, the glass slid open and a young woman (probably in her early 20’s) leaned out and smiled at me.  She had blonde and purple hair with a floral top on.

“Hi,” she beamed at me with a smile.

“Hi,” I answered back, expecting that she would immediately tell me how much I owed for the order and we’d move on.  I mean, this is a drive thru and people are always in a hurry these days.

“Excuse me for a moment,” and she turned away to take the order from the next car in line, just as politely as she had taken mine.  Then she turned back to me.

“How are you?”

I stammered.  I mean, this wasn’t what I was expecting.  Was this a social call?

“I’m doing ok thank you.  How are you?”

“I’m doing great today  The sun is shining and all is well.”

“That’s terrific.  I like the way you’re thinking.  You’re right.  It is a beautiful day out.”

“Excuse me again,” she said as she took the next order.  I watched her speak with a smile  to the next person in line.  It struck me that she really liked her job.

She turned back to me and continued to chat.  I was still stunned that we were continuing to have this casual conversation and she still hadn’t told me how much I owed for my order.  She was completely relaxed even though there were cars behind me and the place was obviously busy.  I was holding the bills in my hand because I didn’t know how much the drink was.  I raised my hand to show her the money in hopes that she’d tell me how much I owed and I could pay for my order.

Then it struck me.  What’s up with me?  I wasn’t in a hurry and yet here I was, chomping at the bit (horse vocab intended) to get on with it.  To pay, to receive and to move out of the way so that the next car could pull up to get their order.  I was not really in a rush and yet, here I was acting like I was because I was so attuned to the fast food mentality of rushing through life.  Yet, here was someone who was completely at ease in a stressful situation and I was not.

She smiled at me again and continued to talk as if we were old friends.  Was I the only one aware that the minutes were ticking by?  We were both looking at each other and it was then that I realized that we were connecting as humans and not as mechanical robots.  She took one more order and then turned back to me.

“Your order comes to $,” she finally said, smiling even more.

I counted out the bills and handed them over to her.  She handed the change back to me still smiling.

“I’m sorry I was frazzled when I pulled up to the window.  I wasn’t expecting us to have a conversation.  It’s usually not done that way.”

“I know.  You did look a bit frazzled but look, now you’re more relaxed.”

Smiling a huge grin, I laughed as she handed me the drink.

“You’re right.  Thank you for making my day brighter.”

“You’re so welcome.  I’m glad we connected.  I hope you have a lovely day.  Enjoy your treat!”

I reached back into my wallet and handed her a tip.

“Thank you for your unique way of being.  This was really lovely.”

“You are so welcome.  You’re not the first person to be caught off guard when I talk with them.  I find it makes the job more fun to meet everyone and to connect with them, even if only for a few minutes.  I hope it makes someone else’s day better when they feel that I really see them and we connect.  You never know what’s going on with anyone, but I find that trying to brighten someone’s day makes all the difference.”

“Well, you certainly brightened mine.  Thank you for your kindness.”

We both smiled again and I waved to her as I pulled away, still aware of the line of cars behind me.  Yet, the funny thing was that none were beeping.  They seemed to all be patiently waiting their turns.  Perhaps it was because they knew that the girl behind the counter would be giving each of them her full attention for a few moments of connection.

As I drove away, sipping that delicious concoction, it tasted even better.  I opened the sunroof and let in the wind and sunshine.  I turned up the volume as the music enveloped my soul.

I silently thanked that purple-haired angel at Starbucks for her sweet reminder.

Connections make all the difference.

Shine On!

xo

 

 

 

 

Rabbit Rabbit

June 1st!  You know what that means, don’t you?  Rabbit Rabbit, White Rabbit White Rabbit!

I looked back to the original post and it was on June 1, 2014 that I began the tradition.  Does it seem like it’s been four years already?  Time certainly flies in some respects and with others, it’s very slow and sometimes tedious.

But today’s a celebration – an anniversary of sorts for the four years that I’ve been reminding you to welcome the new month full of goodness!  So join me today in cheering for a month ahead filled with heartlights shining, love surrounding us and all the goodness this Universe has to offer each and every one of us!

Smile today!  Feel the blessings that are bestowed on you and raise your vibrations to embrace all with whom you connect today – especially yourself!

Shine On!

xo

Make Your Dreams A Reality

Sam and Me!

 

I had my second lesson the other day.  I am in heaven.  It has long been a dream of mine to learn to ride horses as I told you before here about Charlie.

I am making my own dreams come true and I’m truly loving it!

This smile that you see is only a fraction of the one when I was on Sam’s back learning how to balance and ride in the ring.  He is even bigger than Charlie (seriously!) and so I needed a mounting block to get on his back.  But, I am proud to say, that I dismounted all on my own without the block – ok, I’ll be honest, I slid off him, but I did land on my feet and not on my rear end!  That was a plus I think!

Oh my goodness, when I tell you how much my heart is bursting with happiness, there aren’t even enough words to explain how I feel.  It’s euphoria that I am doing what I have always wanted to do!  I feel like my heartlight is shining so brightly!  If I could financially swing everyday riding lessons, I wouldn’t think twice about it.  That’s how much I am enjoying my time with these horses.  Truly.

Go after your dreams.  Don’t lose them because you never know when you will get the chance to enjoy them!

Shine On!

xo

The Waving Girl, Savannah

I have always loved visiting The Waving Girl in Savannah, Georgia.  I’ve spent a lot of time down there, especially over the last few years and I always have the urge to go to visit her statue.  It started when I was younger and I was first on River Street with my family and heard about her.  From then on, she stayed in a special place in my heart for reasons unknown to me.

On River Street, the above statue stands as a testament to The Waving Girl.  She was a woman named Miss Florence Martus who, by waving her handkerchief in greeting to the passing ships, grew a beautiful legend by her simple act of connection and kindness.

Here you can read all about her!

Have you ever been to Savannah?  There is so much to do there!  It’s an amazing city full of Southern charm, ghosts, good food, shops, antiques, history and of course, my favorite, The Waving Girl.

What entices me about her?  I guess it’s the simplicity in which she changed the world around her.  Above you can read how many ships she greeted in her lifetime and what her simple act did for the crews on the passing ships.  They looked for her greeting and looked forward to seeing her waving her handkerchief to them as they passed by.  To me, it’s like smiling at strangers in the grocery store or on the street.  You hope that by that simple act, you connect with someone else for a moment in a good way.

Imagine our world if we were all to greet each other with kindness, with a smile or a friendly wave, asking nothing in return except for a similar greeting!  Oh my, I can feel the world now smile with joy for the love that would surround Mother Earth!  Can’t you?

Here’s Miss Florence Martus waving to you!

Won’t you please greet the next person you see with a smile?

Shine On!

xo

**Photo of Miss Florence Martus, 1931. Photographer Unknown. Courtesy of Bull Street Library, Georgia Live Oak Libraries.

** Photo “Waving Girl” Statue on River Street, 2016. Courtesy of Alison Lechner from the Georgia History website.

 

Out of the Mouth of Alzheimer’s

Recently I had a precious moment with a loved one who has Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia.  It came quite unexpectedly as our phone conversation was in the evening which usually brings sundowners for her which means she can become more easily confused.

But on this evening, the woman who spoke to me was a voice from my past, her voice quiet but firm, yet with a softness for which I had hungered for a long time.  My Aunt spoke with me and I sat ready listening with my heart.

At first, I thought that we would just chat, I would make her giggle and then having connected in the only way she has been able, we would say our goodbye and requisite, ‘I love you,’ at the end of the conversation.  But instead, I received a gift that we shared.

She told me that she was happy that I could understand her as it had been hard on her for a long time.  “Words don’t seem to come to me,” she explained in a resigned voice.  “And I can’t say what I want for I don’t know what I want to say.  It’s been a long time since I was able to be understood.”

I waited patiently, stunned by her admission ~ for the last few years, we haven’t been able to have this type of conversation because she simply hasn’t been able to share how she’s feeling.  Words to even express pain weren’t readily available to her, instead a grimace gave us the inkling that something was wrong.

“It’s like I can see the words, but I can’t reach them.  I get confused easily and then everything vanishes.  My brain just refuses to work like I want it to anymore.  I think that I want to say something and then the thought is gone and I just can’t remember what it was.”

I listened with my heart and felt through the phone her ability at that moment to tell me what was going on with her.  She was strengthened by sharing with me and I am ever grateful that we had that time of lucidity together for it had been a long while.

We had a few giggles as elder sisters can when we talk about our younger siblings.  We’ve always had that bond and it was strengthened for a few minutes during our conversation.  In the end, her sister was getting antsy to talk with me, so she explained that she would give the phone back to ‘the baby’ (aka baby sister) and we giggled.

She thanked me for always talking with her and for being her niece.  She told me that she was glad we had a chance to talk and that she knew we may not be able to talk like this again.  I promised to continue to try to translate for her when the words didn’t come easily again.  I could hear us smiling together as she said, “I love you.  I love you with my whole heart.  Please remember that,” and I repeated the same back to her.

She handed the phone off to her baby sister and the moment was over.  When I hung up the phone, tears continued rolling down my face for I knew, in my heart, I had just been given a precious gift which I would never forget.

There was no pity party invite when she told me what was happening with her and how aware she was at that moment in time that words, thoughts, and understanding escape her.  She didn’t ask why.  She didn’t make excuses.  She only wanted to share with me how she felt and I was there, a ready listener to receive her message.  A true moment ~ The Presents of Presence. ♥

And isn’t that what life is all about?  Being there to listen and connect with a kind, loving heartlight?

Shine On!

xo

January 21 is Hugging Day!

I have learned that there is more power

in a good strong hug

than in a thousand meaningful words.

~ Ann Hood

Today on Sandra Boynton’s page was the lovely post above…so please enjoy a heartfelt hug from me!  Then, take a hug, give a hug and continue to let your heartlight…

Shine On!

xo

 

Tips to Help You Cope With Holiday Estrangements

There may be times in our lives when we feel separated from others and it seems that the holidays are the hardest to bear when we are in this position.  There are no words to balm the feeling of grief and loss, not even succinct platitudes which are uttered that bear witness to the heaving sadness in our hearts.  Whether your estrangement is with the living or deceased, it is sometimes hard to put on a happy face during this otherwise joyous season.

Feeling alone doesn’t help, so I am here to walk this holiday season with you.  Take my hand.  Let’s get a plan in place to make the best holiday season that can be!  I want to say that it doesn’t matter what the cause of the estrangement is or with whom, but then I’d be lying, for each of us in this position feels the pain of estrangement in our own ways and in our own situations and my goodness, it does truly matter.

But in a general way, here are some tips that may help us all.

Decide what makes you happy, festive and in the mood to celebrate and plan it.

Be kind to everyone, (especially you) during the holidays.

Remember Ram Dass’ quote, we are all just walking each other home and as you may be finding it hard to walk home at this time, others may be as well.

Change is difficult, but it opens our lives up to fruitful empowerment.

Take some quiet time for yourself.  Meditate.  Take a bubble bath.  Nourish your soul by feeding yourself loving, peaceful moments of stillness.  Smile.  Pray.

Be the observer in your own life.  See how each and every person you meet is struggling and feel the compassion in being kind to everyone, no matter the circumstances.

Do your best to shine your heartlight.  Do what makes you happy and not for approval of the masses.  They may judge anyway.  Just continuej to be your sweet, loving self.

Get enough rest.  Drink extra water.  Do not overindulge in food or alcohol for it will not help you.

Silence is a gift you give yourself.  If you have nothing nice to say, then please don’t say it.  If someone says something nice to you, allow yourself space to walk away and not engage.

Listen with a loving heart for you may hear tidbits which explain the estrangement (if you don’t already know).  When you speak, do it with kindness and not with negativity nor anger.

If you must leave, then do so quietly without rancor.  Best to err on solitude than to have your actions gossiped over by others.

Remember the reason for the holiday season ~ to show kindness, generosity of spirit and love.

Make good memories for yourself and others by coming from a place of patience and peace.

Look up.  Ask for help from God.  Imagine yourself surrounded by white, loving light which protects you all the time, especially during trying times.

Bless the festivities.  Ask your Angels and God to be there with you as you pass through the holiday season.

Be grateful that you are here and do your best to make a difference with each and every encounter.  Let no one leave you without feeling the genuine warmth of your smile.

Remember that you have a friend in me.  Take my hand and know that you are loved.

Shine On!

xo

 

Loving Someone With Alzheimer’s

There are touching moments on the journey with loved ones with Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia that bring tears to our eyes.  This one caught me and touched my heart.  As a daughter and a niece, there are no words that succinctly fulfill the gratitude I have for this moment even though my family members are still able to identify me.  But knowing that the progression of the disease may come to this moment, my heart fills with the precious and priceless moment that is captured below with a smile.

Even if you aren’t walking the path of memory loss, this viral video reminds us all that we are only here for a short period of time in which to tell our loved ones that we love them, that we are blessed to have them in our lives and to show them how much they mean to us every single day.

It’s never too late to share a special moment with your loved one.  Do not delay dearest friends.  We only have this present moment and as someone who has loved ones who have passed, it is harder when they are gone.  Video tape precious moments with your family members.  Take the time to make special memories with them.  Be patient, be kind, shine your heartlight and be loving You!

Shine On!

xo

Palm Reader Channeled ~ Message For Everyone

The Daily Prompt today asks the question:    You’re on a long flight, and a palm reader sitting next to you insists she reads your palm.  You hesitate, but agree.  What does she tell you?

When she takes my hands into hers, I feel a slight electric buzz, but knowing I am nervous, I shrug off the coincidence.  But is it a coincidence or is it our energy flowing from one soul to another?  Her hands are warm and dry and I feel mine begin to sweat.  My mind pinballs back and forth between thinking this is just a lark and fearing that she has the capacity to read me.  She knows this as she senses my apprehension and yet my willingness to literally put my palm in hers.

She gazes into my eyes and I decide to relax and go with the flow.  My mind still is alert with worry as I do not know this woman at all.  She is a stranger, but dressed in normal clothing.  But there is something angelic about her that I can’t pin down.  But I am trying to show her that I am not afraid of what she may reveal, yet I am worried that she’ll see into my soul with precision.  I assure myself in my mind that I have nothing to hide, but there is a sense of anxiety buzzing through my body.

“Rest easy, dear one.  This experience will not hurt, but only help you as you wander on your life path,” I hear her say and yet her lips do not move.  For a moment I’m stunned, wondering if she is telepathically speaking to me or if it were my Guardian Angel or God or maybe I’m losing my mind.

She nods ever so slightly as the thoughts fly through my head.  She knows what I am thinking!  Yikes!

Without a sound, she turns my palms over to face her and gently holds my hands with hers.  Nervous energy excites and frightens me at the same time.  She lets out a deep breath as I do as well.  Mine is to expel the pent up nervousness.  I wonder what hers is?  A clearing in order to read me?

She drops her gaze and studies my hands quietly.  I feel myself relax and a warm serenity envelopes me.  It’s as if we are in our own bubble in the world.  She closes her eyes for a few moments and her breathing deepens.  I can feel our energies mixing.  I am willing to allow her to read me.

“What I am about to say, may not make sense to you now, but one day it will.  Your life line is long, but breaks in various places.  You have witnessed deaths and have been a death’s door yourself.”

I nod, not daring to speak.

“You are an empath soul, which means you love completely.  You feel what others do.  You are compassionate and a giver.  This trio causes you much pain and yet reaps much joy for your soul.  You are surrounded by a white light and many lessons.  You are not finished with your journey here yet.  You have much to learn, more to grow and many to teach.  Your spiritual awareness is growing, but you fear the acceptance of this knowledge for it makes you different.  But you are already different from the many people who surround you.  You know this, but it feels solitary at times.  Do not weep dear one, for you are never alone.  Your journey is fraught with emotion, spiritual awakenings and compassionate understanding for yourself and others.  You are tested.  You do not fail, if you believe it to be so.  The key of self-worth, knowing you are perfect, whole and complete in the Lord’s eyes will benefit you so remember who you are.  Do not allow the superficial world to sway you.  You are gifted and you must use your gifts and your power for good.”

We had both been staring at my palms as she spoke quietly, murmuring the reading for my ears only.  In such a soft voice, she continued her reading.

“I see hardship.  I see tears.  I see betrayal.  I see forgiveness.  I see love.  I see light.  I see your Divine Purpose coming to fruition as you grow, learn and accept.  I see acknowledgement, acceptance and spiritual understanding increasing day by day.  Do not be content, but strive to learn, to grow, to universally connect with others.  You will be taught and you will teach, that is the give and take of this lifetime.”

I began to choke back the tears that were falling rapidly from my eyes, running down my cheeks with alarming abandon.  My nose was feeling drippy, but I hesitated to break the spell.

“Look with favor on this chosen path.  Allow yourself the freedom to be yourself, to speak from your heart and to allow others to hear what they choose.  Be one with the Spirit of the Divine.  You are human.  Mistakes are made, but the angelic reminders of your life will remain in small moments of the memory of others.  Do not be afraid of financial gain.  Put it to good use in order to spread peace with others.  Connect with your blessings.  Begin again without fear.  Remind yourself often that each day begins a new dawn full of possibility.  Live to your fullest ability for we know not our expiration date.  Be kinder to yourself and others.  Err on the side of love for that is where your strength lies.  Meditate.  Visit Mother Nature daily.  Pray.  Sing.  Patience, dear one.  Time reveals your golden path.”

Sniffling and trying not to gross her out, I began breathing deeply, as the sadness which had overwhelmed me by her words faded away gently without warning.  She turned my hands over, clasping them in hers with a warm, long hold and then released my hands.  My fingers fumbled through my purse immediately to find a tissue to sop up the wet mess that was my face and nose.  She turned slightly in her seat to face the front of the plane, laid her hands in her lap and closed her eyes.  I didn’t dare disturb her.  Blowing my nose with embarrassed gusto, tissue after tissue, I dried my face, setting myself back in order.

As I leaned back into my seat again, I peeked over, but she was motionless, eyes still closed.  I turned my head to look out the window at the sky.  The most gorgeous rainbow I have ever seen appeared as if by magic.  A smile grew on my lips as a warm sense of serenity spread throughout my body.  I eagerly watched as the rainbow faded away as miraculously as it had appeared.  I closed my eyes and fell into a gentle sleep.

I awoke to her nudging me as I felt the plane’s wheels hit the runway at our destination.  She smiled at me, looking into my eyes and without moving her lips I heard, “This was my gift to you, dear one.  I am as grateful as you are to connect and to have had this experience.  Share it with others.  Remember you are never alone.  You are loved.”

The pilot broke the reverie with his announcement that we could begin to deboard and in an instant, she was gone.  I don’t think I ever said much to her.  I began to berate myself for never even uttering the word thank you while she was here as I was so mesmerized by her aura.  Whispering to her spirit, I said, “Thank you my friend,” and I heard her voice reply, “You are most welcome.”

Shine On!

xo