Tag Archive | relationships

What Do You Believe?

whatdoyoubelieve

What do you believe my friends?  Our beliefs begin in childhood, nestling into our psyche right from the start.  Don’t believe me?  Have you ever heard your mother’s words coming out of your mouth for example?  Do you find yourself doing X (whatever example you want to use) just the way you were taught as a child, even when you know there’s an easier or better way?  But you can’t help yourself, and you continue to do it that way because that’s how it’s always been done?  Do you have limited beliefs in yourself because you were told that you weren’t smart enough or that you wouldn’t amount to anything?  Or perhaps you were told you could do anything, and you have?

Parenting before the age of 7 is paramount to a child’s self-esteem and belief system about everything, including themselves.  We may not even remember what we were told, but we know in your minds that it is true.  Even when it’s proven not to be true.  Why?  Because the adults in our lives told us so when we were children.

How’s that for mind-befuddling?

So the next time you are parenting, think before you speak or give yourself a time out in order to center your thoughts.  Your children are listening with minds of sponges and beliefs that you are creating for them for a lifetime.

Shine On!

xo

 

Inspired by The Daily Post prompt: Believe

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The Popular Rabbit, Rabbit!

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I have a bunch of popular posts which I could have never imagined would be the ones that are clicked on most in my stats.  Seemingly innocuous posts are the ones which get the most traffic.  Does that happen to you?

Examples:  My grasshopper one – you may remember, I found a grasshopper in the house.  Or the one about the owl who kept me up at night?  That’s another popular one according to the stats page.  Seeing a shooting star comes up a lot too.  The angelic ones do tend to bring traffic to my site as well.

I think it’s interesting what brings people to our blog posts.  I know that for me, I have been following many of you for years and it feels as if we are friends, even though we’ve never met.  Perhaps that’s the empathetic soul speaking now, but when you blog about something sad or meaningful that has changed your life, I’m there.  When I say I’m keeping you in my prayers, I am.  And frankly, I feel that when you write those things too, you are truthful as well.

Surely this probably won’t be a post you would click on, but I saw the Popular – The Daily Post  prompt and just wanted to write today.

Before I forget, it’s the first of October!  You know what to do, right?

Say Rabbit Rabbit, White Rabbit, White Rabbit!

May October be a beautiful month for you!

Shine On!

xo

A Free Fall Gift For You!

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It’s the first official day of Fall and the start of one of my favorite seasons.  Well, I guess all of the seasons are my favorites for various reasons.  But there’s something about Fall that is so special to me.  The crisp air, the jeweled colored leaves, and the beginning of a new school year are all magical to me.

I enjoy sending cards because even though we are so technology driven these days and we enjoy the quick engagement and banter of texting and emails, there’s something special about getting a card in the mail.  A special paper card that we find like a treasure amidst the bills and junk mail.  At least that’s how I feel.

During the holiday season, we may receive dozens of cards which delight me.  But then what happens during the rest of the year?  Maybe we receive a birthday card, but that’s it.  Instead our mailbox is strewn with junk mail and bills.

I know for me, when I see an envelope that isn’t bill-shaped, I’m intrigued!  Someone has thought of me!  I’m delighted before I even open the envelope.  I know, you probably think I’m being silly, but that’s truly how I feel.

Above is a card from SendOutCards which is a way to send cards from your own computer, but your recipient gets a real card in the mail.  You can even attach a gift card or present as well, from the hundreds of gifts offered on the site.

If you’d like to try it, please send a card on me.  It’s fun because you can personalize the card with your own photos, your own sentiment or you can pick from the huge variety available for you!

The price for a card is cheaper than going to the store and you can send your cards from your own computer or the app on your phone whenever you wish!  I use it all the time to lift the spirits of friends, to keep in touch and to send my own holiday cards!

Making life easier and staying in touch are key!  So, if you’d like to check it out, please use the link below.  Enjoy!

Click here to send a card for free on me!

Shine On!

xo

Accept Them For Who They Are

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Few relationships are perfect as you may know from personal experience.  Many times we wrestle with people in our lives and the relationships we share with them.  It’s a dance, sometimes even a chacha – a few steps forward, a few steps backwards and always flowing.

With that in mind, sometimes we come to the conclusion that toxic relationships need the heave-ho as much as it may or may not hurt.  We choose to discontinue relationships which aren’t working.  Sometimes people become bitter.  Sometimes people become disconnected.  Sometimes the end of a relationship seems not to matter in the least to them and sometimes it matters very much.

But the bottom line is:  Accept Them For Who They Are.

In every relationship, we have opportunities to grow and to learn.  Sometimes they are lessons we would rather not have and sometimes there are no horrendous lessons, just good old-fashioned love and comfort.  Do you know what I mean?

But those who are difficult in your life may be here to help you along with the lessons of life.  They are not here to necessarily be a pain in your neck as it may seem, but instead may be teachers who help you to grow in life.

Some relationships are here for a lifetime, some only for a season.  What bonds us to people is simple:  love and acceptance.

No relationship is perfect.  But in accepting people for who they are, we truly love them.  Not superficial love or that controlling love whereby we make it conditional.

True love which sometimes is rare.

You choose who you love and you can choose to love with heartfelt acceptance or not.  It’s truly up to you.  But to meet all people with acceptance in your heart is difficult at times.  We wish people reacted or acted in certain ways because it’s easier.  But to accept them for their choices is far better for us.  Give free will to love.

It’s an ongoing lesson for me which in my life has had twists and turns and has filled up my dance card with many chacha’s.  But I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Love your life and those in it, past, present and future with acceptance.

Shine On!

xo

I Just Can’t Remember

Ijustcantremember

I saw this posted on a friend’s Facebook page today.  What a poignant reminder!

With Alzheimer’s, people don’t forget how much they love you or how much you mean to them.  Sometimes it’s just that they don’t remember the specifics.  When I try to put myself in the mind of someone with memory loss, this is how I imagine I would feel.

To spend quality time with someone who loves you is a precious gift.  No matter who you believe they are, you are at peace feeling the love and comfort that you have with them.

Alzheimer’s is a great reminder to find The Presents of Presence in every moment.  Many times, those with memory loss live in the present moment and as long as we stay in the happy flow, all is well.  It’s when we dip into the past or sadness that things become a bit complicated.  I think it’s a choice to live in the present and to enjoy that priceless moment of being with someone we love and sharing that time together.

It’s an important lesson I’ve learned through being involved with those in memory care facilities.  With memory loss, life is stripped down to the bare minimum – health, food, clothing, shelter, love, kindness, dignity, caring, honesty, gratitude and blessings are what count.  Designer goods, class distinctions, holding grudges and all that vibrates at lower frequencies isn’t important.

What matters is love, plain and simple.

Shine On!

xo

 

 

 

 

Via FB post from a friend.

 

Teenagers In The New School Year

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Friends, you’ve read my A grade classroom rule from when I was a teacher.  You’ve read my Parenting post which may or may not have made you angry or defensive.  My intention is to include you in the hug I want to give all the parents/students/teachers at the start of the new year.

Dear Teenager,

Well, you’re next in line for my posts and I’m going to be honest, like I was in earlier posts because this is all about you in the end.  This is your life and you will either listen or turn away.  I won’t try to control you, but what I will try is to steer you towards victory because that is where you belong.

Your journey begins on the first day of school.  But you and I both know that it began when school ended last year.  Because what you did over the summer (or didn’t do) makes a difference.  Did you read the assigned book(s)?  Did you finish the summer math packet you are supposed to turn in at the beginning of the year?  Please tell me you did.  And if you didn’t, then please get it done!  Those assignments are most likely going to be graded and if we’re going to keep your A, they need to be completed.  No excuses!

I hope you like your teachers this year.  But if you don’t, please don’t allow your feelings to bring your grade down.

Example:  My son didn’t like one of his teachers at all a few years ago.  He just didn’t like the class – didn’t like the subject, didn’t like the way she taught it, didn’t like the content and didn’t like anything about it!  But he needed the class and had to pass it.  Because he was angry, he didn’t want to work for her and didn’t complete his assignments.  In his head, he was annoying her by not working.  But when I explained that he’s giving her the easy way out by simply throwing a zero in the grade book for no assignment done, he was making her life easier.  Instead, I suggested that he do the homework, turn it in and make her work to grade it!  Ok, I know you are probably shaking your head saying, And he fell for that?  But he did fall for it.  He understood that he was bothering her by doing the work and it ended up giving him a great grade when the year was over because in his mind he was consistently annoying her since he found her to be so annoying!  And yes, he knew all along what I was doing, but he also found a way to change his thinking and not hurt his grade!  Funny thing is, he ended up liking the class in the end because he gave it a chance to be liked!

It’s all about your perception.  Did you know that?  What you perceive when it comes to school is a choice that you make every day.  You choose to do the work or not.  You choose to study or not.  You choose to act rambunctiously or not.  You’ve got the power to make your life better or worse.  Choose wisely!  You don’t have to continue down a path you don’t like anymore.  Change direction!  Start to do your work and annoy your teachers!  You never know what may happen that’s good!  At least you’ll have good grades!  And if you’re bored at home, you’ll now have something to do.

This is your life and you’ve got to live it, but don’t throw away opportunities to make your life better.  Getting good grades and learning everyday are win-wins for all!  Learning something new everyday grows your brain.  Getting good grades opens doors to all sorts of opportunities.  Making connections with your teachers and getting involved in clubs and/or sports, helps to  broaden your life interests and expands your connections and friend group.

But what if you’re shy?  Or feel you are not liked?  Or you’re a loner?  What if they bully you?   You feel out of place?  You have a hard home life?  Nobody understands you.

Come here dear one – let me hug you.  Let me walk beside you on this path.  You are not alone even though you feel that way now.  Many of us have felt that way too, but we are still here.  We are here to help you go through those life lessons too.

Reach out to trusted friends or faculty members.  Go see the nurse or the school counselor.  They are trained to help you through these hard times.  I know it’s hard to ask for help, but it’s your life and you deserve all the help you can get.  Talk with your parents if you can.  Speak from your heart.  Be honest.  Tell them what’s going on.

I want you to know that I feel for you.  I have children of my own and they tell me what you have to deal with on a daily basis.  That’s why I want to hug you for all you have going on daily, in addition to school.   Life has become more complicated than we realize as teachers and parents and adults.  But that’s no excuse for you to not do your best or choose to be the best you can be!

If you’re having a tough time with your parents, let me explain a bit.  It’s not necessarily you, but sometimes it’s your parent who is projecting their stuff because your parent is frustrated with the current circumstances.  You need to elevate your game and work harder.  This is your life so you owe it to yourself to do your best.  I want to remind you  that nobody’s perfect and that your parents are trying to do their best under the circumstances, but that you need to do your part as well.    I want to remind you that your  parents’ frustration with you is real and you need to be mindful of it.  Your job as a student is to work to your potential and be the best you can be.  But that the criticism you are  hearing in your parent’s voice is more out of frustration and not knowing how to help you.  They do love you a lot!  They are trying to understand what’s going on, but it’s hard for them.  Share with them what’s going on!  Tell them if you can’t see the board or if you have trouble remembering facts.  Tell them if you’re the last one picked for a team for gym and how it makes you feel (I was that girl myself.  I know how it feels.)  Perhaps they will understand too.

You are dealt the cards of life.  Each of us has our own set to play and nobody’s life is perfect.  No matter what you think, let me repeat, nobody’s life is perfect.  The best lesson in life is to know what your cards are and how to play them for the best life.  I don’t mean cheating with your cards either or taking the easy way out and turning to drugs because you can’t deal with your situation.  Nope.  There are other choices that are healthier and better for you.  I know it feels hard at times.  But remember,

You matter.  You count.  You are worthy of your special place here in this world.  Believe me.  The universe and God don’t make mistakes. 

I’m sure some may have extenuating circumstances not discussed in this note.  But the same advice applies to you – reach out!  Ask for help!  There are many people that are in place to help you on this journey of life!  Look around!  We’re all here ready to lend a helping hand, to give advice, to share a hug, to applaud good effort and most importantly, to help you up if you fall down.

So why do you feel like you’re doing all the work here?  Because it’s your life!  It’s YOUR life and together we are going to make it the BEST it can be!  But we all need your involvement in order to make it work!  Teachers, parents, adults, friends, and faculty are all here to support you in your life  But you have to let us in to help you along the way.

Choose wisely dear teenagers.  Make us work to give you the best life possible!  You deserve it!  Have the BEST YEAR YET!  Big hugs and lots of love from me to you! ♥

Shine On!

xo

 

How To Sprinkle Priceless Moments Throughout Your Day

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The Daily Post inspired me today to write, so here it goes!

I have a gift called The Presents of Presence.  You may know it and me by now, but if you don’t, here I am.  I love to sprinkle priceless moments throughout the day.  You know what I mean, don’t you?  Those quiet moments when you smile at a stranger and they smile back.  Or when you make a connection with someone else through blogging or a random conversation or even one of those long soul to soul conversations we have sometimes with the ones we love?

It’s stopping to look around and catching the Praying Mantis sitting there on the patio chair when you’re outside watering the plants.  If I hadn’t been looking around, I certainly would have missed his presence.  It’s the small reminder that when we don’t take the time to notice all that’s around us, be it in nature, in friendships, in changes in the air or in the vibrations, we miss priceless moments.  It’s in being PRESENT, mindful and still at the precise moment to enjoy a gift from God and the Universe.

Synchronicity and coincidence share special space in my life.  Countless times I have noticed a priceless moment simply because it was there, waiting for me to see it.  When we are open, we allow these priceless moments to be felt and acknowledged.  When we are gung-ho rushing through life, we may miss them.

You can be the receiver of the priceless moments or the giver.  Best of all, you can be both!  Sprinkle happiness wherever you go.  Enjoy meeting new people, sharing the road of life and sparkling by being you!  You are a gift to us all!

Shine On!

xo