What To Do When You Fear The Truth

Recently I had a startling experience with an uninvited guest in my home with whom, unbeknownst to me, I was sharing my discarded vittles.  Yup, you guessed it ~ I had a mouse in my house!

I screamed and continued howling in fear as the mouse and I met unexpectedly one evening.  We both stared at each other, frozen in fear from my continued screeching until he finally got hold of his senses and scurried back into hiding.  The tears and fear erupted in me, like a volcano spewing and I began to shake, still staring at the place we had met.  It took quite awhile for me to calm down as the fear leapt into my brain and I worried where he’d gone, how he’d gotten in and if he had a family of squatters now residing in my home.  And, to top it all off, why in the world weren’t my two diva cats patrolling the house?  Weren’t cats supposed to chase mice?

This whole episode led me to facing the truth with a heartful of anxiety every morning for days when I would be fear finding out the truth ~ were there more mice?  Had they returned to my home?  Were they indeed making a nest here or were they just passing through?

It seems to me, until the truth of any situation is thrust into our faces, that we fear the truth.  We fear knowing something that changes our lives.  We turn a blind eye to happenstance evidence, preferring to not make waves in what we deem the tranquility and peace in our lives.  But as I’ve learned, we can’t put off the inevitable.  It happens in the blink of an eye and many times at the most inconvenient of times and yet, with Divine Timing.

So the next time you are fearing the truth in any situation, know in your heart that facing your fears like the cat and mouse above, only makes things easier.  For once you know the truth, you can deal with the situation.  You can ask for advice, you can connect with others and you can eventually move on after you’ve processed the fear of change.  This bodes well for almost any life situation that you fear.

Take a giggle from my mouse adventure today and know that no matter what truth you are facing, you have a friend in me.

Shine On!

xo

 

Lucky You

Do you believe in luck?

Full Definition of luck by Merriam-Webster is:

1. 1 a :  a force that brings good fortune or adversity

2. b :  the events or circumstances that operate for or against an individual

Curiously, I believe in luck and yet, I don’t, which is a conundrum on St. Patrick’s Day even though I have a smidgen of Irish in me.  I believe in fate.  I believe in free will.  I believe in karma.  I believe in the ability to change our ways of thinking in order to change our lives.  I believe in angelic help.

And I believe in you…and I believe in me.

What do you believe?  Have you ever sat for a moment to ponder your beliefs, to write them out and then peruse them?  Do they still stand stoically rooted in your childhood beliefs as they were downloaded to you from your past or have they changed over time, expanding the limits to an expanse of limitlessness?

Beliefs from childhood can be limiting or limitless depending on our circumstances and what is downloaded to us from our parental figures and from those whom we looked up to as children.  As we grow, we learn and expand our thinking or we can stay stuck in those beliefs that were given to us from the start.  It’s a choice to see ourselves as limited or limitless.  It’s a work in progress as we develop our mindset to raise our personal vibration in the world at large.

Perhaps it’s that old adage of seeing the glass 1/2 empty or 1/2 full or with gratitude for even having a glass.  Today in honor of feeling lucky, I’d love to hear from you.  Are you lucky?  Do you believe in luck?  What do you believe?

Lucky you, you can choose your thinking!

Shine On!

xo

 

Nurturing Thursday

“Above all, trust in the slow work of God.
We are quite naturally impatient in everything
to reach the end without delay.
We should like to skip the intermediate stages.
We are impatient of being on the way to something
unknown, something new.
And yet it is the law of all progress
that it is made by passing through
some stages of instability—
and that it may take a very long time.

And so I think it is with you;
your ideas mature gradually—let them grow,
let them shape themselves, without undue haste.
Don’t try to force them on,
as though you could be today what time
(that is to say, grace and circumstances
acting on your own good will)
will make of you tomorrow.

Only God could say what this new spirit
gradually forming within you will be.
Give Our Lord the benefit of believing
that his hand is leading you,
and accept the anxiety of feeling yourself
in suspense and incomplete.”

~ Pierre Teillhard de Chardin

 I found this poem today and wanted to offer my post to Becca Givens of  On Dragonfly Wings With Buttercup Tea https://beccagivens.wordpress.com/2016/02/25/nurt-thurs-allowance/ who inspires me by her willingness to connect with others with love and light.

May your heartlight find comfort in the poem above today!

Shine On!

xo

How To Stop Being a “Fixer”

It is truly time to allow, to let go and to find a way to not fix it all. I was/am? a person who liked to be in control. Not demanding mind you, (at least I didn’t think I was), but I liked to know the plan and execute it. We may sound similar if you are reading this post. But I have learned that through this journey, I’ve had to let go and it is still hard for me to do. But in letting go, I’ve opened up to an abundance of awareness, growth, love, friendship, connections with others and had an incredible soul journey that would not have been available to me had I stayed in the control, fix it place. Because, what hit me was the line, ‘who died and left you boss? You are not God,’ which I hope does not offend you, but perhaps gives you the added boost to see from an observer mode instead of the path ahead (that we had planned so carefully) that has literally fallen to pieces.

I see the path ahead now, strewn with debris and sometimes avalanches of emotion, hurt, betrayal and sadness. But there is still a path and as I take baby steps forward, I can clear the debris, learn from the experiences and keep moving on. I’ve found that there are others on this path that help me as I help you and as you help me to move forward.  And then also to rest when needed.

I’m not asking you to give up control or to stop fixing…I’m only asking you to accept what is unacceptable as part of the journey of life and to find peace in your heart to welcome the lessons as they will make you stronger in body/mind/soul. It’s a great leap of faith that is your opportunity here. I’m not saying that you need to find God as I don’t even know how you feel about religion.  I believe in God, Divinity and the Universe.  I am comfortable in being spiritual and using what I learn by reading, by communicating and by connecting with others and I find that I am making my own way, picking and choosing what feels right to me at that time ~ and sometimes choosing again when it’s not serving me. That’s the beauty of life.

Many of us come to this life with the idea that everything should be hunky dory because we’ve worked so hard to make it be as such. We strive for the even keel and smooth sailing, but storms arise, even in nature and we must accept that piece in order to find peace. There comes a time in life when we need to grow, to expand our horizons, to search for our next level of understanding in life.

Fix yourself is the first lesson.  Take care of you ~ nuture yourself, grow in your understanding, be patient with yourself and others, read, meditate and allow.  Allowing yourself 5 minutes of silence in which to simply breathe and focus in the morning and at night helps.  You are in charge of you.  You are not in control of anyone else on the fixing level.  Every single person has free will and can choose how they live their life.  You are not God.  Allow Him to do His job and you will see how amazing life can be!

Shine On!

xo

What Is Strength?

“The strongest people are not those

who show strength in front of us,

but those who win battles

we know nothing about.”
~ Anonymous

Happy Saturday!

Shine On!

xo

 

What We Can Learn From Winter (and I’m not writing about the season)!

Have you ever seen the 2011 movie Dolphin Tale?  Or its sequel Dolphin Tale 2 which came out in 2014?  The movies chronicle the life of a dolphin named Winter who was maimed by being caught in a crab trap and thusly, lost her tail.  I have seen the movies before, but I find that I always enjoy them as their universally inspirational message rings clearly to me.

We are here to work through our trials and tribulations and we are also here to inspire others.

We can be hurt, heartbroken, maimed and feel as if we can’t survive, but with help from those around us, even perhaps strangers, we can find the will to go on.  As we heal, we can choose to live our lives as an example of what the human or ‘ahem’ dolphin spirit can achieve with love.

I recently visited Winter’s site click here!  I learned that beginning Monday February 1st, a real-life follow up show series called Rescue-Clearwater will premiere online documenting the work at Clearwater Marine Aquarium.  Each episode will be released at the beginning of the month and be 30 minutes in length.  What a great way to catch up with Winter’s progress!

I highly recommend clicking on their website.  There’s even a real-time webcam to watch Winter and Hope and all the rest of the animals.  What fun to watch Winter as she swims and how inspiring to see her!  Don’t you just love a great feel good story?  I know I do!  Open your heartlight and let it shine!

Have you ever been to Clearwater to see Winter?  Please share below!

Shine On!

xo

January 21 is Hugging Day!

I have learned that there is more power

in a good strong hug

than in a thousand meaningful words.

~ Ann Hood

Today on Sandra Boynton’s page was the lovely post above…so please enjoy a heartfelt hug from me!  Then, take a hug, give a hug and continue to let your heartlight…

Shine On!

xo

 

Let’s Talk!

Having a conversation is an art, a give and take between two people.  Even the simplest of howdy-do’s in the grocery store involves the art of conversation.  Many times, our goal to have a conversation with a loved one falls short when we have different skills, goals and intents.  Our conversation styles are all different and when we have a hard time of meeting in the so-called middle ground, that’s where problems occur.

We all have ways we can improve our chatting styles, but I believe that when we come from a heartlit place, doing our best, we can see/feel/have a great conversation no matter how our partner is behaving.  It takes two as we all know to have a conversation for a one-sided conversation, if not listened to with a loving heart, falls on deaf ears and can have the opposite effect on the listener that the speaker intends.  Have you ever had a conversation that was one-sided?  Have you ever felt misunderstood?  Has someone taken your silence for something more than mindful consideration before you speak?

So here are a few questions to ask yourself for we all have trouble with talking sometimes:

Do you find yourself speaking with thoughtfulness?

Or do you just blab whatever you are thinking without restraint?

Do you refuse to connect?

Do you shout and then forget what you have said?

Do you try to speak in a normal tone with calm intention?

Do you drone on and not get to the point?

Do you feel a time restraint and therefore tell it all without preamble?

Do you take time to pause to see if your listener is following you?

Do you not stop for fear of what the other person may say?

Do you stay quiet and not engage in the conversation?

Do you interrupt when a person is speaking?

Do you follow along with their thoughts?

Do you take off on a tangent in your own mind and forget to keep listening?

Are you more concerned with what you have to say?

Are you truly feeling what the person is telling you?

Are you numbed by the conversation or enraged by it?

Do you let your emotions get in the way of listening?

Do you let your emotions get in the way of speaking?

At times, all of us find ourselves in the situations above, doing what is our first instinct even when we realize that it may not be what is beneficial for the conversation.  If any of the above touched a nerve with you, then perhaps you need to review your conversation skills.

Our childhood experiences many times are our first instinct when it comes to our conversation skills.  Come from a family of yellers and it is easy to drop into that form of conversation when we are angry.  Past experience in receiving harsh words in conversation, can either make someone repeat that or hide away in silence.  Either way, there’s a distinct tear in relationships when we find ourselves going to either extreme.  It takes patience and practice to have a conversation whereby each individual is comfortable in sharing and in being heard.  There’s a loving give and take, a learning and a trust that is inherent when we converse with others.  The finesse involved in making a conversation beneficial involves both parties meeting in the middle no matter what their first reactional conversational style is and that’s where it’s sometimes hard to navigate muddy waters.

We are all growing everyday with new skills being added to our repertoire of conversation.  As we navigate life, we can drop what doesn’t serve us and add to what does.  It takes time.  It takes patience.  It takes trust.  The best part is that when two people want to do their parts in making having a conversation a loving experience, it certainly is possible.  And that my friends, is the best part of all!

Shine On!

xo

Sharing Mindful Conversations

There’s a peaceful way of being when we are in the moment of mindful conversations with loved ones ~ especially those who have memory issues such as Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia.  Too often, we can be caught up in the web of needing/wanting them to be able to revert back to the loved ones we once knew and the loved ones we miss from before the illness arrived.  It is hard for both parties to find a peaceful way to communicate when there’s been such a change in our loved ones.  If there are unresolved issues, it’s even harder for those who are not afflicted by memory issues.

There is a plus though that when we take the time to understand, we can heal from the bereft feelings that may lay dormant in our attempts to converse at the previous levels that we did with our loved ones.  As I understand and have experienced, being that I have loved ones who are in a memory care facility, many times our loved ones are living in the present moment and when we can get onto that path of presence with them, we can have the loveliest conversations when we leave our sadness and baggage at the door before entering the conversation.

Does this make sense to you?

For me, when I just allow the communication to flow between us.  I enjoy our conversations even when they are repetitive.  Just to chat daily is sometimes a struggle, but I try to have a few giggles prepared to keep them aware of my life and to inquire about theirs and to joke about silly things that we remember together ~ like songs, family phrases, good memories.  Keeping the conversation light, allows them to participate and to feel good and thus, I feel good.  Sure, there are times when they are feeling poorly and get angry or frustrated and then I simply allow them to speak, to repeat and to process if they are able to do that along the way.  Sometimes a complete change in conversational direction is necessary and that’s when it seems one of my cats do something silly and I can easily interrupt and change the channel to a lighter note and we can resume with them feeling good, feeling connected and I feel the connection as well.

It saddens me though I try to keep my heartlight shining as much as possible.  I awoke this morning crying in a dream.  All I remember from it is the repetitive words, “I love you,” from my loved one.  Even though at the end of every conversation, we repeat, “I love you” to each other at least 5 times, I relish every single “I love you,” and I have for awhile now.  Because I know that there are those who wish they could hear those 3 precious words again from their loved ones and someday I may be in that same position.

There are those of us who find it hard to take time to call our loved ones with memory problems.  It isn’t easy to carve out time from our busy lives.  But if you want to stay in touch, a visit, a card, a small token of yourself, a photo and even a phone call helps to bridge the gap and I believe it helps our loved ones to stay in touch with us and not feel so lonely.  Because, let’s face it, when your mind is not working like you remember it to work and you’re frustrated with memory issues or your mind simply goes on the fritz at times, it’s hard to bear.  From what I’ve seen, once you cross that bridge from knowing that your mind is fighting a losing battle with the disease, to accepting the new place your mind is in, I think it’s easier for the patient.  But it still brings out the sadness is us all.

Don’t shy away from mindful, loving conversations.  Enjoy the loving connections while you can for one day, you may wake up dreaming, “I love you” and not be able to hear that precious phrase, except in your memories.  Those that have memory issues need to feel loved, treasured and cherished, just like everyone else on the planet.  It is our job to remind them…I love you.

Shine On!

xo

Hemingway’s Every Man

“Every man’s life ends the same way.

It is only the details of how he lived and how he died

that distinguish one man from another.”

– Ernest Hemingway

I found this quote and am so inspired by it for 2016!  For we all have an expiration date which most of us do not know until it comes, unless we decide to pass.  So, instead of making goals for 2016 or choosing a word for your year ahead ~ perhaps we could all think about the details of how we live this year, how we distinguish our own lives from the masses of droplets in the ocean and how we can better connect on a higher vibration with the rest of our world in a peaceful manner.

Just a little thought for a Monday in a new year…

Shine your heartlights!  I see you!

Shine On!

xo