Tag Archive | universe

On My Knees

onmyknees

As you’ve seen in my last few posts, life has been hard these days.  For me, writing is my outlet, sharing what I think might help someone else who is a caregiver of someone whom they love who has Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia.  I write in order to connect with others who are walking this path because we understand how emotional it can be and you just need support from others who get it.

There is no cure for this disease.  It is fatal.  As the mind shuts down, the body begins its journey as well.  It’s genetic as well, which means that those of us with relatives with the disease, can be subject to it in the future.

Think about that for a moment…what you may be witnessing as a child of a parent with Alzheimer’s, may be you one day.  It puts a terrible spin on the whole experience, don’t you think?  For then, with that knowledge, we wonder if we have it and every tidbit of forgetfulness becomes a full blown worry if it’s early onset of the disease.

Just because a parent has the disease, doesn’t necessarily mean that the offspring will develop it though, which is good news.  For it’s hard enough to watch a loved one struggle to hold onto information, recognize people and remember that loved ones have passed away.  The incessant questioning and cycles of repetition can make it hard to be patient, especially when we are hurting as well.  In truth, I’ve cried a boatload of tears lately in frustration and sadness in feeling so helpless.

The power of prayer and faith helps.  When I can’t stop trying to fix the situation or at least better it, I find that getting on my knees to pray helps quiet my mind.  Simply handing it over to God for the night, once I finally let go, let Him in and let God take it from here that is.  I’m a tough cookie.  I like to keep a handle on things so it’s harder for me to allow the Universe and God to hold onto everything while I sleep. But it helps so much.

Do you ever find yourself on your knees praying when all else fails?

Shine On!

xo

 

 

The Present Moment

pinkflower

With the uncertainty of life, we let go when we have exhausted all means of control.  Sometimes it takes us longer to finally come to the conclusion that there are simply parts of life that we must allow for we cannot stop them.  For a planner like me, it’s always felt unacceptable.  Searching my brain, I would try to come up with endless ways to make whatever situation better for me, my family, my friends ~ relentlessly trying to improve a situation that I found unacceptable because it was causing someone else or me pain.

But there are times now, after sleepless nights of fret, worry and planning, that I am learning, albeit slowly, to let go and to allow God and the Universe to proceed.  What I’ve learned in the wee hours of the morning is to go with the flow, release, let the river take its course and have faith that as long as I can put my head on the pillow in peace, knowing I have done all with a loving heart, there is nothing more I can do.

However, it’s hard ~ this letting go.  So I am learning to let go and let God ~ and let Him in.

I think it’s human nature to believe we’ve got this, we can figure it out and make it work.  But we forget that there is God, the Universe and the Laws of Attraction who also carry us when we allow them to work their ‘magic’ as well.

Being in the present moment is a life lesson worth learning for me.  I am watching my Mom struggle with Alzheimer’s and being in the present moment with her.  Sometimes her present moment isn’t ‘reality’ but wherever her brain is at the time.  So to honor her, we gather in her present moment and support her, enjoying whatever gifts we can.

It’s a shift of thinking that has taken me a long time to accept and to process in my own brain.  However, love is accepting and above all, I love my Mom.  So I accept where she is at any given moment.  I’ve come a long way baby, but I still have much to learn.

Isn’t that the way life school is anyway?  Learn, practice and love?

Shine On!

xo

Alzheimer’s Disease and Telling a Loved One About a Death

alzheimersflowerMy Mom recently lost her sister with whom she lived in a memory care facility.  It broke my heart to deliver the news to her, so I remained mum for a while and didn’t tell her.  She believed our Aunt was still alive in the hospital for longer than she was, as we contemplated how to tell her the sad news.

But God and the Universe had different plans.  For you see, her resident friends who knew Aunt Mable were also concerned about Aunt Mable and wondered when she would return home.  Mom was told that she was still in the hospital getting treatment, but in truth, she had passed away.  Little could any of us know that one little lady, who is wheelchair bound, blind and has hallucinations along with memory issues would be able to succeed in calling the hospital in hopes that Mom could talk with Aunt Mable and get more information.  A miracle unto itself that she accomplished this with her cell phone.  Sadly, she got the news that Mable had passed away and in a loving manner told Mom.  I know she thought she was helping, but her announcement wasn’t what we had planned.  We were trying to get to Mom to tell her ourselves in person.

Looking through the eyes of an observer, this little lady’s heart was in the right place.  She saw our Mom upset and wanted to help and when I see the situation with a loving heart, I am grateful.  But in that moment when Mom reached out to me, sobbing that she had heard that her sister had passed away and was frantic, I felt powerless.  I had wanted so much to shield Mom from the pain and be there when she found out in order to help her through her grief.  In the end though, life unfolded as it was meant to be.

It is hard for anyone with memory issues to remember, let alone to keep the information that a loved one has passed away, for their ability to remember fades and rallies, moment to moment.  The acceptance of what feels unacceptable (a death of a sister) is too much for the mind to handle and it fades, only to return after a bit and the grief begins again.  It’s a roller coaster for all involved as we try so desperately to soothe a broken heart as the knowledge comes and goes, along with the grief.

There’s no easy way and from my experiences, the only rule is to keep a loving heart, flow with the moment’s understanding and continue to offer love and support to Mom.  That’s all we can do in every situation quite honestly.  Be open, be kind and love.

May you find your Sunday to be filled with peace and love, this is my wish always.

Shine On!

xo

 

 

 

Wishing You Love and Happiness

wishingyouloveandhappiness

Happy Valentine’s Day dear friends!

I wish you love and happiness today and always.  May you always remember how cherished you are to those who love you (and to me!) and how grateful and honored I feel to be connected with you!  May we send out kindness and love to those around us today and always.  May we all feel the infinite love of God, the Universe, and the Divine in every moment!  May we love ourselves and others.  May we cherish our connections (both past and present) and increase them exponentially every day by our kindness, generosity of spirit and gratitude.

May we remember how loved we are, every single moment of every single day.

You are loved, dear friends.

Shine On!

xo

 

When You’re Feeling Like the Only One

whenyou'refeelingliketheonlyone

There are times in life when you just feel like you’re the only one who is enduring (insert whatever it is that you are experiencing).  You may feel as if nobody understands your situation.  You may even feel alone, untethered and grieving.  It happens to all of us.  It is a normal part of the ebb and flow in life.

But to reach beyond and out of the moment is where your lessons in life school challenge you to search within and to look up and all around you to connect with yourself, God, the Divine Universe and with others of like-mindedness.  To find the positivity in any situation, to allow yourself to be present with the pain/hurt/disappointment and to find a sense of peace even while chaos swirls in one of life’s lessons is the key.  It is in human eagerness the need to smooth the rough edges, to bypass the grief at all costs, to hide away the disconnect from ourselves and others and to make everything okay as soon as possible.  Sure, wallowing in sadness cannot be limitless, but to experience what we are feeling, as we are feeling it and to connect with whatever we are feeling is beneficial.  The choice to move beyond that to a place of peace no matter the circumstances is the lesson here.  And as you know, for we have all had our trials and tribulations, it is not an easy task at times.

But it is possible…and it is your choice for you have free will.

Cloistered in self-pity, does not serve you, nor the world.  It isolates people, disconnects them from reality and from those who want to help.  But it takes courage to connect with others and to connect with our own hearts.  It takes trust in the soul’s knowing that we can open up and be with whatever is happening.  That’s the tough part which many of us find distasteful as we lack the trust within ourselves and therefore, lack trust in the Universal Truths of Life.

I have been there dear friends.  I understand how you feel no matter if our circumstances are not the same.  The bare fact is that the similar feelings join us in ways unbeknownst to most of us.  Universal Healing happens when we connect through hearts and souls on this life path.  The simple act of connecting with another soul, hearing and feeling that someone else understands, makes all the difference in the world.

So today, no matter what you are enduring, please know that I have my hand here for you hold.   My heart is here to connect with yours and my understanding is available to help you to continue on this life path of healing.  I have learned that in reaching out, we also benefit in our own healing and through connecting, we raise our vibrations, enthusiastically joining and reverberating peace throughout the world.

Shine your heartlights.  Join together in peaceful presence.  I see you shining!

Shine On!

xo

Drop Your Cosmic Vending Machine Belief

dropyourcosmicvendingmachinebelief

This is a hard post for me to write today, but I think it it’s an interesting concept.  I can’t seem to find the origin of the idea that there’s a cosmic vending machine in the Universe that when we do good deeds, act politely, do what others want us to, etc., we believe that our desires/wants will be granted once we’ve paid in full.  Or for that matter that there’s any definitive price of goodness or suffering that heralds the gift of winning the lottery, getting into the college of our choice, being healed, finding a soulmate, getting that promotion or even having another person respond to us the way we believe we deserve.

It’s a false belief that was ingrained in my head from childhood and I’ve perpetuated the belief for years until it became a part of me.  I can’t explain what’s shifted this thought for me, but I can share that what I feel now is empowering in the fact that I do not stand by the cosmic vending machine expecting anymore.

Yes, I still do good deeds.  Yes, I continue to strive to be the best person I can to everyone with whom I come into contact ~ be it family, friends or strangers.  Yes, I still look for good things to happen to me and I am grateful for each and every gift from God and the Universe.  That hasn’t changed.

But what has shifted is the mindset that because I do all of these things, strive to be authentic, loving, compassionate, caring and empathetic in connecting with my fellow man in life, I deserve the good things that happen in my life.  In addition, with this shift comes the letting go of the guilt baggage that I believed that I wasn’t enough when tough times entered my life.

How’s that for a huge shift in thinking?

It goes against the norm, I know.  Perhaps you will not agree with me either and that’s ok.  I’d love to hear from you either way as I am open to all ways of thinking about this topic.  Honestly, I love to expand my thinking so please, be kind, but be honest.  Do you look to the Universal vending machine when you think you deserve that special something?  Do you lament when you’ve been a very good person and yet tragedy and disappointment seem to conspire against you?

How do you feel about this topic?

I think from a young age, we are taught to be good, respectful and to follow the rules and to not hurt others.  We are rewarded by parental figures when we act in the social norms of society.  We may even be treated when we are exceptionally behaved or get good grades and such.  I think that perpetuates the vending machine belief.  I’m not saying that we do things for a reward.  No.  Most of us do them because it feels right and good to help others, to be respectful, to be kind and loving and it raises our heartlights when we connect with others in a good way.  Most of the time, we don’t expect the cosmic vending machine to treat us when we are simply doing what is expected.

But there are times in which, we’ve been trying to be good, do good and we feel as if nothing good comes from the experience.  Instead, we get tough times, tragedy, heartache, grief and loss and we throw up our hands in frustration.

“Why me?” seems to be the popular question when this happens.  Over and over some people will perseverate over the fact that they’ve been good and yet bad things are happening.  Woe is me thinking begins to take over or the extreme of “well, then I’m not trying anymore” and a give up attitude, “What’s the use?” begins to grow.  Resentment increases and do-gooding goes out the window.

But if we could release the belief of the cosmic vending machine waiting for our good tally to be paid up in order to be given whatever it is that we are thinking we deserve because of ‘x, y and z’ then life would be different.  We would feel more empowered and free to accept whatever life experiences come our way without shame, guilt or ego.  But we’ve all heard the ‘get what you deserve’ line and I feel like it’s debunking itself when we rid ourselves of that belief.

We would be empowered and that’s a very good feeling.

Shine On!

xo

P.S.  I am not talking about God or religion with the above post.  For me, that’s an entirely different post which we can chat about another day so please don’t beat me up. ♥

 

 

Perfectly Imperfect

snowmanstarsSnow Angels Bless the Winter

 “Perfectly Imperfect

We have all heard that no two snowflakes are alike. Each snowflake takes the perfect form for the maximum efficiency and effectiveness for its journey. And while the universal force of gravity gives them a shared destination, the expansive space in the air gives each snowflake the opportunity to take their own path. They are on the same journey, but each takes a different path.
Along this gravity-driven journey, some snowflakes collide and damage each other, some collide and join together, some are influenced by wind… there are so many transitions and changes that take place along the journey of the snowflake. But, no matter what the transition, the snowflake always finds itself perfectly shaped for its journey.
I find parallels in nature to be a beautiful reflection of grand orchestration. One of these parallels is of snowflakes and us. We, too, are all headed in the same direction. We are being driven by a universal force to the same destination. We are all individuals taking different journeys and along our journey, we sometimes bump into each other, we cross paths, we become altered… we take different physical forms. But at all times we too are 100% perfectly imperfect. At every given moment we are absolutely perfect for what is required for our journey. I’m not perfect for your journey and you’re not perfect for my journey, but I’m perfect for my journey and you’re perfect for your journey. We’re heading to the same place, we’re taking different routes, but we’re both exactly perfect the way we are.
Think of what understanding this great orchestration could mean for relationships. Imagine interacting with others knowing that they too each share this parallel with the snowflake. Like you, they are headed to the same place and no matter what they may appear like to you, they have taken the perfect form for their journey. How strong our relationships would be if we could see and respect that we are all perfectly imperfect for our journey.”
Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

Shine On!

xo