I want to see you be brave is a line from a Sara Bareilles song. Being brave requires honesty with ourselves and others. It’s hard to be vulnerable and courageous at the same time. Sometimes it’s easier to just let things be, let relationships chug along without upsetting the proverbial apple cart. We get complacent and we don’t want to rock the boat for fear of What will they think? What will happen to me?
But what I’ve learned is an old saying from my Mom:
Those that mind, don’t matter,
those that matter, don’t mind.
But in reality, sometimes it does hugely matter to us what others are thinking and saying about us behind our backs or in front of our faces because we want the best of us to shine on and not be dirtied by judgments from others. And that’s where your brave comes in and matters.
Finding peace within to be who we are is a gift that we give to ourselves and to the Universe. It’s a choice that we make everyday and a decision that we ultimately have the control over at every moment in time.
I struggle with wanting to say how I feel in some relationships. And sadly, I don’t say what I want to say and let the words fall out. Why? Because it’s easier to keep peace. I don’t want to hurt anyone. I shy away from being brave out of fear.
I’m learning slowly to stand in the truth, the facts and be with what is. Some relationships have slowly faded away because I just don’t have the energy. Sure, I listen and play nicely, but I know it’s a superficial relationship. Do you have those kind too? You’re nice. They’re nice. But there’s no real trusted connection anymore?
I think life has a way of re-arranging our relationships for the better if we would only let it. We fight it because of the belief we have in our heads about how things should be. But who says that’s right to begin with? Who says we know best?
I wish we could all be brave and speak our truths. But to do that, there must be trust within the listener because otherwise, it’s all for naught.
It’s like when you are so depressed and someone asks how you are, you answer fine and move the conversation along. If we could all speak from the heart, listen from the heart and hold hands through the hardships, there would be less disgrace in the world and more love.
Here’s to hoping for more heartlights shining, more truth and connections growing and cheers to being brave.