This is a hard post for me to write today, but I think it it’s an interesting concept. I can’t seem to find the origin of the idea that there’s a cosmic vending machine in the Universe that when we do good deeds, act politely, do what others want us to, etc., we believe that our desires/wants will be granted once we’ve paid in full. Or for that matter that there’s any definitive price of goodness or suffering that heralds the gift of winning the lottery, getting into the college of our choice, being healed, finding a soulmate, getting that promotion or even having another person respond to us the way we believe we deserve.
It’s a false belief that was ingrained in my head from childhood and I’ve perpetuated the belief for years until it became a part of me. I can’t explain what’s shifted this thought for me, but I can share that what I feel now is empowering in the fact that I do not stand by the cosmic vending machine expecting anymore.
Yes, I still do good deeds. Yes, I continue to strive to be the best person I can to everyone with whom I come into contact ~ be it family, friends or strangers. Yes, I still look for good things to happen to me and I am grateful for each and every gift from God and the Universe. That hasn’t changed.
But what has shifted is the mindset that because I do all of these things, strive to be authentic, loving, compassionate, caring and empathetic in connecting with my fellow man in life, I deserve the good things that happen in my life. In addition, with this shift comes the letting go of the guilt baggage that I believed that I wasn’t enough when tough times entered my life.
How’s that for a huge shift in thinking?
It goes against the norm, I know. Perhaps you will not agree with me either and that’s ok. I’d love to hear from you either way as I am open to all ways of thinking about this topic. Honestly, I love to expand my thinking so please, be kind, but be honest. Do you look to the Universal vending machine when you think you deserve that special something? Do you lament when you’ve been a very good person and yet tragedy and disappointment seem to conspire against you?
How do you feel about this topic?
I think from a young age, we are taught to be good, respectful and to follow the rules and to not hurt others. We are rewarded by parental figures when we act in the social norms of society. We may even be treated when we are exceptionally behaved or get good grades and such. I think that perpetuates the vending machine belief. I’m not saying that we do things for a reward. No. Most of us do them because it feels right and good to help others, to be respectful, to be kind and loving and it raises our heartlights when we connect with others in a good way. Most of the time, we don’t expect the cosmic vending machine to treat us when we are simply doing what is expected.
But there are times in which, we’ve been trying to be good, do good and we feel as if nothing good comes from the experience. Instead, we get tough times, tragedy, heartache, grief and loss and we throw up our hands in frustration.
“Why me?” seems to be the popular question when this happens. Over and over some people will perseverate over the fact that they’ve been good and yet bad things are happening. Woe is me thinking begins to take over or the extreme of “well, then I’m not trying anymore” and a give up attitude, “What’s the use?” begins to grow. Resentment increases and do-gooding goes out the window.
But if we could release the belief of the cosmic vending machine waiting for our good tally to be paid up in order to be given whatever it is that we are thinking we deserve because of ‘x, y and z’ then life would be different. We would feel more empowered and free to accept whatever life experiences come our way without shame, guilt or ego. But we’ve all heard the ‘get what you deserve’ line and I feel like it’s debunking itself when we rid ourselves of that belief.
We would be empowered and that’s a very good feeling.
P.S. I am not talking about God or religion with the above post. For me, that’s an entirely different post which we can chat about another day so please don’t beat me up. ♥