Tag Archive | light

The Little Soul and the Sun

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The Little Soul and the Sun:  A Children’s Parable Adapted from Conversations With God

By Neale Donald Walsch

I love sharing with you and today I wanted to share the special book above which my friend MoJo at Momentum of Joy! recently suggested that I should read because it was such a great little book!  So, I simply hopped on my trusty kindle, the one I gifted myself this year after reading Sharechair’s all-things-kindle  many posts about this wonderful machine!   Within minutes and after a small credit card charge, I had downloaded the book and was ready to read it.  Truly, I love the ease of technology!  We are so blessed, aren’t we?  I could have waited 2 days to receive the book by mail, but I felt that pull to enjoy it today and I am so grateful that I listened to myself!

It’s a children’s book, but it’s also very adult-friendly and as I began to read it and understand it, tears began trickling down my cheeks as I felt my soul start to be soothed in a way I had never before felt.  It was like an avalanche of understanding that had welled up inside of me, burst through the dam that I had erected around my heart and I felt loved.

I know I’m probably not making sense again ~I guess it’s like when I recently said I feel delicious from my post The Shift to Feeling Delicious but I want you to know that this was again ~ a shift, a changing book and I wanted you to be aware of it if you weren’t already.  Do you know Neale Donald Walsch?  Have you heard of him?  He sends daily emails which are inspiring to your inbox when you get on his list.  He also has a few more books out that you can read as well.

You see, with my dad gone, it’s been a bit rocky trying to wrap up his affairs and business while mourning him ~ and having so much left unsaid.  Surely there are others out there reading my blog who may have had this same experience ~ not being able to understand parts of a parent or loved one who’s passed and wanting to ask so many questions?  I am sure I am not the only one, am I?

Anyway, my relationship with my dad was messy and I’ve often wondered, pondered, asked out-loud to the air, why he acted the way he did with me ~ why he treated me the way he did and hundreds of other inquiries that I had.  My mom has repeatedly said that he loved me, but there are moments where I seriously doubt that he could have loved someone and still acted the way he did.  His favorite saying was “You hurt the ones you love the most” ~ to which I would always reply in my head, “Then don’t love me.”  It was a true conundrum to me…until now.

I won’t give away this book as I think it may read differently to each person who reads it, but I want you to know that I get it now.  I understand and I am so grateful for my dear MJAngel and for her wise suggestion.

So if you’re interested in getting your own copy for yourself, your children or your grandchildren, click The Little Soul and the Sun: A Children’s Parable Adapted from Conversations With God.  I truly think that whether you get the hardcover book or you get the kindle version, you will be changed by this book ~ in such an amazing way.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Do you know about Neale?

Have you read his books before?

Please share with me!

Shine On Little Souls in the Sun!

xo

Miss America’s Mastectomy?

http://todayhealth.today.com/_news/2013/01/11/16463704-miss-america-contestant-gets-hate-mail-over-mastectomy-plans?lite

Dear Miss District of Columbia,

You don’t know me, but when I saw the article on you yesterday, I just knew I had to write to you.  Please accept my deepest sympathies as I am so sad that you lost your mom, your grandmother and your great-aunt to breast cancer.  My heart goes out to you for the difficult decisions you have to contemplate at the tender age of 24 in order to reduce your risk of enduring breast cancer.  As an 11 year breast cancer survivor who was diagnosed at age 34, I can’t even begin to imagine how difficult this decision is for you.  My heart goes out to you.

Although my story is different from yours, I wanted to share in hopes of letting you know that there are those of us who understand.  My journey began with a lumpectomy.  Originally I had wanted a bilateral mastectomy instead of the lumpectomy, but my surgeon denied my request, citing his philosophy to save the breasts and keep them intact.   However, when the pathology results revealed there was further breast cancer invasion to the lymph nodes and outer margins, I was scheduled for a second surgery which was to remove only the cancerous breast.  And that’s when I started listening to myself ~ just like you are doing now!

I called my surgeon back and scheduled a double mastectomy even though nobody agreed with me, least of all my surgeon.  But I know me, and as I began listening to me, I  knew in my heart that it was ME who was going to inhabit my body, day in and night out and it was my comfort level which had to have first priority.  There were shady calcifications in the other breast which to me, would eventually lead to breast cancer again, so I wanted that out of the equation in my life!

It’s been a rocky road for me with the reconstructions, but I have never once regretted my decision to take both of my breasts and I can happily tell you that I feel that I am here because I really listened to myself.  I think our bodies know what we need to do and it is just a matter of our listening to our own bodies which helps to heal and not hinder our lives.

I am very proud of you for listening to yourself and to your body and for having the courage to stand up and speak about it.  Please don’t let anyone else’s opinion sway you because it is YOU who has to live in your body everyday and it will be your healing or your fight in the end and nobody else’s.   It is not easy to live without your breasts and it is a painful decision to make ~ however, I stand firmly beside you ~ for it is YOUR rightful decision to make and no one else’s.  Surely your mom, your grandmother and your great aunt proudly applaud your courage as do the rest of us.

I love your quote, ““I’ve been thinking how powerful that might be to have a Miss America say, ‘I might be Miss America but I’m still going to have surgery. I’m going to take control of my own life, my own health care,’ ” she said. “So I guess it’s up to what happens on Saturday night.”

May you continue to be a shining example of  light, of hope  and of taking control of your own life,

your own healthcare to the millions of women and men in the world!

Shine On Miss District of Columbia!

Long May You Reign!

xo

The Shift to Feeling Delicious!

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Through synchronicity last week, Hay House delivered to my inbox, the opportunity to download The Shift by Dr. Wayne Dyer for the incredibly low price of $1.99 .  Being the bargain shopper that I am, I immediately checked out the preview footage and being intrigued, I dug out my credit card to get the 2 hour movie to stream to my computer.  Now the next hurdle was how, as a busy Mom, wife and business owner, was I going to carve out 2 hours to watch it?  However, last Friday, I finally sat down to watch the movie…and it changed my life.

Usually I am not speechless when it comes to my blog (or to anything for that matter), but I have been unable to find the words to explain The Shift except to say that when the movie was finished, I laid down on my couch, closed my eyes for a few moments to take in the experience and felt a blissful peace that I hadn’t felt in years.  The words remarkable, stunning and life-changing come to mind ~ but I think the best is ~ I felt DELICIOUS!

Delicious?  Did she just write delicious?  That’s how food tastes, it’s not a feeling!

I know, I know…but have you ever felt delicious?  It’s a feeling I had never experienced until now and quite frankly, it’s one that I won’t forget in the near future.  Words escape me in explaining it more…but it was a calm, an inner healing, a feeling of complete happiness in my soul that I experienced and I’ve been able to call up that feeling for the last few days when I’ve gotten quiet and asked to feel it again.

I wanted to share it with you because it’s a new year and this was a new experience for me, one that I think you’ll enjoy, appreciate and one that may change your life for the better as it’s done to mine.  Whether you are a man or woman, this profound movie will easily touch you.  You don’t need to be an enlightened being to ‘get it’ nor does being an enlightened being make the move boring to you either…it’s one for all ages, for all people and for myself, it’s a keeper.

I’ve been quiet the last few days because I’ve been trying to figure out how I could tell you what ‘I feel delicious’ means…but I’ve decided that I’m just putting it out there for you to taste and see the delicious experience that The Shift brings.  Be open, let it gently wash over you and then let me know what you think!

Do you want to feel DELICIOUS too?

Shine On and Shift!

xo

Want to buy the book?  Or buy the movie?  Just click  here!

There are others talking about it too!  Check out the blogs below!

http://martinlumsden.wordpress.com/2012/12/09/secret-messages/

http://thiswitchsheart.wordpress.com/2013/01/01/the-shift-with-dr-wayne-dyer/

Connections…From the Other Side…

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Deepest Sympathies For the Loss of Your Beloved Pet

The above is the card that I sent my friend BAngel when her beloved dog passed away.  Feeling a little melancholy this morning, I thought that I’d repost from my friend BAngel’s new website and blog!  I wanted to include her post because I believe that it is fitting for those of us who have lost our dear pets and loved ones.  We all want to find that connection from our dearly departed loved one and it matters not if it’s a pet nor human.   https://misifusa.wordpress.com/2012/08/01/spirits-in-the-night/  To feel that connection, that love link is something yearned for by many who are left earthbound without their loved ones.  I know that I’ve written about this before ~ and shared with you some of our experiences with my Dad.  https://misifusa.wordpress.com/2012/12/28/life-after-death/  Bobbi’s signs are special ~ so I’d like to introduce her to all of you!

My “Little Cricket” Connection

January 6, 2013 By

I am so aware that our souls do not die when our bodies do, but I do struggle with the passing of my sweet, little, black shih tzu, Sophie, in spite of knowing that. I had to put her to sleep recently because her heart failure made it so hard for her to breathe, and I didn’t want her to have to struggle to breathe any more. I felt that decision just rip a hole in my heart that day because I was so attached to her for almost 13 years. I loved her so much and I couldn’t believe I would not be able to hold that little, soft, warm body on my lap anymore, or feel her pressed against my feet in bed at night or her standing on me with her full-body wag to wake me up every morning. I loved that she nuzzled in my neck when I picked her up to carry her home from our walks when her heart got tired. I loved the way that tiny little 10-pound dog, when she was at her healthiest and happiest, would give full-body barks at the squirrels and giant birds in our trees, backing up with each bark like a cricket springing backwards. She even did her reverse, full-body “cricket bark” one time and landed backwards in the pool much to her surprise! I loved her hard-to-see black little pearl eyes as they trustingly stared into my face for reassurance – even on her last morning.

She was sweet and she was special, and everyone who held her knew that, too. She communicated what she needed so cleverly. She was seldom hungry and had to be coaxed to eat every single meal, but I didn’t mind. And I didn’t mind getting up around 2 am to let her out to empty her little bladder every night for over 12 years. I would have to soothe her later in life from all the things that made her tremble like when we had thunderstorms, or visitors, or when almost inaudible electronic clicks from the stove or iron alarmed her, but she was so worth it.  I was feeling just so deeply saddened to have to end that beautiful life. I tried to make myself feel better at first reminding myself that she wasn’t really gone, not her spirit anyway,  just her physical form. But, as often as I would remember her energy wasn’t gone, it wasn’t enough. I would then want to connect with that energy. I was simply missing my physical Sophie so badly that I wanted to really “feel” her energy with me. I had always heard that when a loved one passes, his or her soul’s energy raises to a much, much higher speed that it was when slowed down by the physical body, but I still ached to connect with her, somehow. I said a little prayer asking for a sign or a message from her and then let it go, hoping it would come.

To read more and comment…and perhaps find a new blogger to follow ~ or even get a life coaching session….here’s the talented Bobbi!

http://www.openyourjourney.com/my-souls-journey-with-sophie/

Happy Sunday to All and Shine On my friends!

xo

I found a few other posts that were similar…so I thought I’d share!

http://passionfortheparanormal.com/2013/01/04/do-animals-have-souls/

http://passionfortheparanormal.com/2012/12/20/how-the-spirits-communicate/

http://alittledeathblog.com/2012/12/20/so-long-farewell/

http://motherhoodisanart.com/2012/12/17/she-was-thinking-about-him/

Today is Your Day to Twinkle Sparkle Glow and Shine

Today is Your Day to Twinkle Sparkle Glow Shine

Officially it’s January 1st, 2013, and with the dawn, a new year is heralded in today and officially closes the door on 2012….at least in my book.  I awoke this morning with the little ditty of Rabbit Rabbit in my head (and out my mouth) before my first sip of coffee.  I’m not taking any chances on the first day of the month AND new year!  Are you scratching your head and wondering why?  Here’s the answer!  https://misifusa.wordpress.com/2012/09/01/rabbit-rabbit/

In the meantime, I thought this was a great card to begin the new year with ~ Don’t you love the optimism of this card ~ it has the ability to make you smile and to increase your desire to continue to SHINE ON!  This is yet another year to shine for all of us!  Are you ready?  On your mark, get set and let’s Twinkle Sparkle Glow and Shine On this year!

It’s only a matter of attitude ~ a shift if you will ~ and like any habit, it’s one that you can acquire easily without much extra effort…you just have to remember that you are a shining star.  That’s it!

You shine on with your attitude, your words, your expressions and by being yourself!  Even the brightest stars may have days when we feel less than sparkly, but our light is always shining in our souls!  I would love to see us all twinkling, sparkling, glowing and shining this year!  Imagine if as a connected community we allowed our inner lights to blossom and ignite the lights in others!  We could be a fireball of enthusiastic bloggers who connect like the amazing twinkly lights of the New Year’s Ball in Times Square!  Imagine the world cheering us on as we descend next New Year’s Eve on a year filled with every type of shining moment imaginable!  Imagine the power of a community filled with love, light and individuals who’ve come together with enthusiasm, optimism and in inspiration!

So please join me this year as we travel on our Journey of Endurance ~

Igniting our inner stars to

Twinkle,

Sparkle,

Glow

and Shine On! 

Happy 2013!

xo

‘Tis the Season to Send Out Love

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‘Tis the SEASON OF LOVE and LIGHTS!

I awoke before dawn this morning as I often do and as I rose from my warm bed after gently kissing my sleeping husband next to me, I padded down the hall, kitten tumbling along by my side, to visit both my children’s sleeping forms to plant a kiss on their foreheads ~ so very grateful, especially today, to have them home, safe, healthy and hopefully dreaming of sugar plums in their heads.  Don’t you feel it’s the little things that count so much this Sunday morning?

Before bed last night, I came upon a beautiful post http://robincoyle.wordpress.com/2012/12/14/want-to-send-a-card-to-sandy-hook-elementary-school/  which I simply have to share…as it gave such a simple, yet wonderful idea that I am reblogging it.   Yesterday I asked you to Send Out Love, breathing in and out Love to All…https://misifusa.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/in-loving-tribute/ and now today, I will ask you again for a few moments of your time.

When I was first diagnosed with breast cancer, I received so many loving cards in the mail from my school community and my students (I taught 8th grade at the time).  Their heartfelt notes and caring words helped me as I began the difficult process of healing by soothing my mind, heart and soul with the prayers and healing thoughts that I received.  Now 10 years later, I still remember the powerful healing effect their cards had on me ~ and I am ever grateful for the powerful loving light which surrounds me even today.  This is probably why, when I was introduced to SendOutCards, I instinctively understood the power of a heartfelt message in a card.

I feel like I’ve been given the biggest Christmas gift and I want to share it with you…please take a moment, click on my link below and follow the easy instructions to make a free card to send to the families of the Sandy Hook Elementary School.  If you send out love to them, I will pay for the card and postage.  You only need 10 minutes and a computer.  You can be anywhere in the world ~ it matters not ~ so please don’t feel that you need to be in the US to participate ~ and you can do it at any time!   Up at 3am because you can’t sleep?  Hop on your computer!  The instructions are in English, Spanish and French!  Just watch the quick video in the language of your choice and then click SEND A FREE CARD ~ and voila ~ you’re on your way to sending the card of your choice, writing your message and having it sent for you!

Imagine the healing power of your words ~ imagine if we as a blogging community could SEND OUT LOVE and healing thoughts and prayers to those who are hurting ~ especially during this holiday season…imagine the ripple effect across the world…one baby step at a time…imagine what we accomplish when we connect with others ~ one light at a time!

So please, click below on my website…it’s my gift…take a moment to send a free card on me.

Together we Light up the Darkness…

Shine On!

xo

Send a Free Card on ME!

The school’s address is:

Sandy Hook Elementary School

12 Dickenson Drive

Newtown, CT   06482

In Loving Tribute…

32644914_Never take a person for granted. Hold every person close to your heart…

Yesterday, we received the news of a school shooting in Connecticut which has saddened so many especially since many of the victims were kindergarteners.  Since the news continues to unfold and for me, there’s no reason why or how something so devastating could happen, that’s not the purpose of my post…except to highlight the moment of silence I ask of you.

A moment of silence please…take a moment to breathe in love and exhale loving thoughts to everyone in the world today and yesterday who is/was suffering.  Let your love wash over them, bringing them the peaceful feeling that love ignites in hearts when it is truly felt.  Take the moment to include your loved ones, sending out your love to them on the invisible plane, guiding your love to everyone you know, sending love even to your ‘enemies’ so that all who come into contact with you feel your love today.

How do you feel?  Breathe again…breathe in the love that the world has for you and breathe out the love you have for the world.

When life becomes overwhelming as it sometimes does, breathing love in and out helps.  Chemically, psychically and emotionally, not to mention physically, breathing in and out love soothes your tired soul, emits and improves the energy which surrounds you and affects all that you connect with in a positive way.  It’s like lighting a candle to illuminate the darkness except that you need no candle ~ nothing more than yourself and your loving thoughts.

So today, please take the present moment for yourself and for others and send out love…hold everyone close to your heart…

Enjoy the Presents of Presence for that is your gift ~

A gift that you are given every moment of everyday.

Know that I am here for you ~ keeping you all in my heartfelt thoughts ~

Together we are connected and we make a difference.

Shine On with Love!

xo

Please enjoy some other bloggers I found who had a bit to say today…

http://freedomtoafulllife.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/righteous-anger/

http://soulwritings.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/a-message-for-today-234/

http://livingsuccess3d.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/time-to-inhale-12/

http://waitingforthekarmatruck.com/2012/12/15/when-the-heart-just-hurtsl/

http://passionfortruths.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/practice-of-non-violence/

http://goalhabits.com/2012/12/15/sadness/

http://donnapeach.com/2012/12/14/silence-in-honor-of-lives-lost-at-newtown-ct/

http://weepingintodancing.wordpress.com/2012/12/14/god-will-spin-the-straw-into-gold/

http://womenswindow.com/2012/12/14/christmas-wishes/

http://lifesjourneyblog.com/2012/12/14/rest-stop-friday-tragedy/

http://davidkanigan.com/2012/12/14/once/

http://phranqueigh.wordpress.com/2012/12/14/the-language-of-loss/

http://dogdaz.com/2012/12/14/heart-broken/

http://sharingmemyselfandi.wordpress.com/2012/12/14/innocent-souls/

http://marciameara.wordpress.com/2012/12/14/sandy-hook-elementary/

http://400daystil40.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/68-days-til-40-in-memory-of-ct-students/

http://jumpingonclouds.com/2012/12/14/a-prayer-for-the-families-in-connecticut-and-for-all-of-us/

http://ladyromp.com/2012/12/14/we-need-prayer-right-now/

http://cribbings.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/humanity-in-despair/

http://enchantedseashells.com/2012/12/14/no-words/

http://cauldronsandcupcakes.com/2012/12/14/when-we-know-somethings-wrong/

http://oursoulspurpose.com/2012/12/14/pray/

http://superkatwins.wordpress.com/2012/12/11/please/

http://ayearofmakingadifference.com/2012/12/15/but-first-to-grieve/

http://abundelic.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/sadness/

Light the Way…

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I thought I had scheduled this post to be written this week, but I guess I didn’t do it right…forgive the lateness of it…I’m posting it anyway.  I am home and safe, just in a lot of pain, so I’ll resume soon I promise.  In the meantime, here’s the one I had ready for you while I was gone. xo

I have my surgery tomorrow so I won’t be posting for awhile.  I awoke this morning in a haze, writing in my 1/2 sleeping stupor as I so often do ~ dreaming of 3 posts in which I tell it like it is ~ much like https://misifusa.wordpress.com/2012/11/28/breast-cancer-boobs-oprah-and-dr-phil/.

But alas, I hopped out of bed instead of trying to remember them and now they are lost.  Perhaps it is better this way.

I want to make some points though before I endure my 4th surgery this year…not that I don’t believe I’ll be back to write again next week ~ but since each day is a precious gift, I want to make sure that you enjoy The Presents of Presence no matter what…and that perhaps through my experiences and your own, you can feel the preciousness of the gift of today.

There are a few points that I want to make…

I learned with my first breast cancer surgery back in January 2002 that even though we are all connected, you must rely on yourself, for nobody can live your life for you.  I remember that day every time I walk into an operating room because the memory in burned into my mind.  I hugged and kissed my beloved hubby goodbye, dressed in the 2 hospital gowns and no-slip uniform slippers that they gave me.  I didn’t want to let him go and nestled my head into his shoulder with such force as to hope to meld completely into him so as not to have to go in alone.  He is my strength you know.  But after a few moments, the nurse quietly pulled me from him and led me to the operating room where I walked in, praying that I’d make it through the surgery and walk out.

I had never felt so alone as the doctors and nurses rapidly readied me for my surgery.  They were all business-like and I realized that I was alone ~ in my head, in my thoughts and in my strength.  I remember saying prayers in my head, ones that I had learned as a child and as the anesthesia took over, they had become the mantra of ‘please help me God.’

One of the hardest lessons I believe that we have to learn is that this is our life and we are responsible for it.  We can lean on others for help, for support and for love and happiness, but truly, the job comes down to us.  After that first surgery, I realized that I needed to find my inner strength in order to survive and in order make my life, body, soul healthy again.

I also learned that we are only a soul encased in a body shell of the same structures.  When you are stripped down to wearing the 2 uniform gowns and generic slippers, you aren’t wearing any jewelry, nor makeup or hairpins.  You are just as you were born.  It makes no difference how big your ego is, or how much money you have, or how good-looking you are, or how many children you have, or if you are gay or if you are straight or if you are any type of religion.

Your body reacts the same no matter who you are on the outside/inside.  Your heart still needs to beat, your lungs still need air and you require your inner strength in order to heal properly.  I have found after 13 surgeries, you are not a person usually when you are operated on ~ you are body which needs help and the professionals who surround you do their best to make that happen.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve felt my soul.  I’ve had moments where I’ve looked out of my eyes as my soul and seen the world through my soul’s eyes.  You can say that I am trying to fix my shell by this current surgery which is very true.  And yes, I am doing it for me, so that I live with less daily pain and because it can be done.  But I also know that it’s my soul who counts the most, not the shell which encases it.

I am not sure I am making sense today to you.  Perhaps I should have made 2 different posts ~ because I know this isn’t the most congruent post I’ve written.  I hope you will get my gist though and that it will make you think of yourself and your shell and soul…and your inner strength.

I long to make a difference in this world…to touch the hearts and souls of others through the experiences I’ve endured because without making a difference to one, I feel that it is all for naught.  I feel like God gave me this burden to strengthen me, to teach me compassion, love, light and a heartfelt lesson of faith.

I want you to know that I stand by what I say ~ that I am reaching out to you through my blogs ~ to hold your hand when you are feeling down and need a friend.  I can’t be your everything, but I can stand beside you and be with you on this journey.

I have had a blessed life, of that there is no doubt.  I am loved and I know it ~ and for me there is no greater gift than to send out love.  So please, make it a point everyday to send out love to others and most especially to yourself.  You are loved.  Be the candle that lights the way for another…pass it along and never let the light die out of your life!

Shine On!

xo

Got Christmas Spirit for me?

8354_It’s December 2nd and I’m having a tough time getting into the holiday spirit this year which is so very unlike me!  I am the gal who begins decorating the minute we leave my inlaws house after Thanksgiving dinner!  My enthusiasm begins immediately as I scurry to the basement to begin to bring up all of the holiday paraphernalia ~ an old Santa hat on my head, dancing around, singing off-key Christmas tunes by myself, in utter glee that my favorite season has finally begun!  My family is used to me doing this and the boys/hubby just laugh because they know my joy knows no bounds when it comes to Christmas.

For I STILL BELIEVE!

But this year, it’s different and I’m not sure the reason for it…but I will say, that I don’t like it!  Perhaps it’s the sadness that envelopes my family occasionally, knowing that this will be our first Christmas without my Dad.  Perhaps it’s having endured 3 surgeries thus far this year and in anticipation of my next one on December 10th ~ knowing that I’ll be laid up until almost Christmas Eve.  Perhaps it’s because our church now sings these new holiday songs which nobody knows and not the tried and true beautiful hymns of my memories during Advent.  Perhaps it’s the overload of dealing with the mountains of paperwork and extra responsibility required of me as Executor to Dad’s estate and now taking care of Mom’s affairs as well.  Perhaps it’s just me.

I guess it’s another lesson in my life ~ getting a glimpse into the world of those who don’t carry the Christmas Spirit in their hearts.  For whatever reason, there are people who don’t find the twinkling of lights, the generosity of spirit and the beauty of a loving heart contagious.  It’s not about religion either, as for me, I embrace the holiday spirit no matter if you celebrate Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa or any other Holiday as long as you do it with a sprinkling of the Spirit of Love!

I’m trying to conjure up my usual enthusiasm…

I’ve watched a few Christmas specials on tv ~ ELF, Eloise at Christmastime (I’m her in my head as a child, but not in reality!), and even put the dvd of Polar Express on!  I’ve got my favorite Fresh Balsam candle burning to make my house smell like my favorite live Christmas tree (which always puts me in the mood).  I’ve had Christmas Carols playing on the radio, I’ve put out a few of the elves and Christmas red and greens, but my spirits haven’t come up yet.

This situation plagues me as even when I was diagnosed with cancer, I still had the Christmas Spirit ~ and I was diagnosed on New Year’s Eve, having endured a biopsy which I was assured wasn’t cancer on December 26th, right after I hosted our entire family to Christmas dinner…which I remember, I LOVED because it was our whole family together, smiling, laughing and exchanging thoughtful gifts.  It’s the magic in Christmas which I adore…the magic of giving, of receiving and of actually feeling the love in the air!  It’s Holiday Spirit ~ when everyone is on their good behavior so that Santa doesn’t think you are naughty!

I’m usually the one who enjoys helping you ~ but perhaps you can help me today. 

Surely I’ll find my holiday spirit soon, but in the meantime, please tell me about yours! 

Like Auntie Mame, I need a little Christmas now…

Shine On and Enjoy!

xoxo

Shining Soul

Pick a star up in the sky and pretend that star is me.

Shining bright with love for you, so all the world can see…

Yesterday I told you a bit about my life and how it feels to be a woman without breasts because they were taken due to breast cancer.  This is my 3rd foray into trying to have breasts again and I am blessed to have found such an amazing doctor who has changed my life with her dedication to women who have endured more than their share of heartache, pain and emotional/physical anguish.

I will honestly tell you that the road to the ‘new normal’ after having breast cancer and multiple surgeries (10th breast cancer related surgery scheduled for December, but #14 in my life) with one more for 2013, is not an easy road to endure.  It’s a road full of pot holes, disappointments, pain and yet triumph as well.  It’s a road that is best when shared with others ~ easier to share with those of us who have traveled it or are traveling it with you.  It’s not for the faint of heart although I am still known to faint at the sight of a needle even after all of the needles I’ve endured over the years.

It’s no different than life for everyone else for we are all on this journey together.  None of us escape heartache, pain and sorrow.  Perhaps you’ve not had breast cancer, but you’ve been shouldering an illness, abuse, depression, a different type of cancer or some other difficulty.  It may not be the same, but the choice is ~ you can endure it and keep taking baby steps forward or you can allow it to rule your life and not move forward.

It’s your choice my friends.  What I’ve learned though is that it’s a choice that I make everyday. 

I can choose to allow my situation bring me down and epitomize the victim role/attitude by feeling sorry for myself, by crawling inside and not taking the helping hands which are offered to me.  Or I can choose to rise from it and shine like a star!  I can use my experiences (there are many beyond breast cancer but that’s for another day) to help others, to be kind, to be understanding, to have patience…to help, to support and to guide by what I know and have gleamed from my own life.

Learning to love your own body is a lesson we all need to learn, breast cancer or not! 

Learning to love yourself for me is a life-long process.

As I thought about my post yesterday, I realized that I have old tapes playing in my head of not being enough and perhaps that’s why I’ve been having such a terrible time lately ~ and perhaps that’s why Dr. Phil and Oprah’s magazine struck such a chord in me yesterday.  My inner voice, you know, that inner strength broke free yesterday from the bonds that I’d imposed on it.  Today I feel freer, I feel more like the girl I love to be ~ the one that may give you TMI (Too Much Information), but will do so willingly if it helps even one other person because that’s my goal here on my blog.

If I can touch just one of you, help one other person to feel that they are not alone, that yes, I have experienced the same as you and I am still here…inspire you to keep taking baby steps…then I feel like I am living according to my divine purpose.  Because that’s why we are all here ~ to help each other on this journey of life.  Helping hands can be found everywhere.  We all have a story to tell…it’s up to you how you write your story!

Breasts or not, I am still a woman who can say she is blessed to have seen the darkness of life and has chosen to search for the light and found it! 

You can’t appreciate the stars if you’ve never endured the darkness! 

Shine on my friends!  Shine on!

xo