Tag Archive | how to survive the first holiday after a loss

How To Count Your Blessings

With the coming of Fall, begins the coming of change,

which brings a glance back into our hopes and desires,

and reveals the multitude of wondrous blessings that shape our lives.

Thanksgiving is on the horizon, Christmas and Hanukkah too as you can see in the stores with their brightly lit decorations lately.  I realize that Fall has already started, but I like the quote and the card so I used it today.  Because I think now’s the time for us to realize this change in our lives and begin to count our blessings that are shaping our lives.

Sometimes, it’s hard to find blessings and to count them, especially after a loss.  Minds can get stuck in that raceway of grief and we are unable to stop the car and get out to stretch our minds.  It’s like being on that hamster wheel and feeling afraid to jump off, so we continue to run the same sad tapes in our minds.  It takes courage, it takes a hand to hold and it takes strength to put mind over matter.  And it’s not easy.

When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer

Finding and accepting the new normal which comes after the death of a loved one can be difficult as anyone who has had a loved one already know.  To count our blessings and get into a gratitude state afterwards is often a steep hill for some people because they are mired in the loss.  I’ve watched as my own Mom stagnated in her sadness since the loss of my Dad 1.5 years ago.  Weekends are the hardest for her as that was when he was home all day and she misses that part of her life.

So how do you count your blessings:

1.  Start small.  Be thankful you are here.

2.  Look up ~ spiritually and literally!

3.  Connect with others.

4.  Start a gratitude journal ~ write down one or more items every day for which you are grateful ~ more if you can do it!

5.  Write down the people in your life ~ list why you are grateful for them.  Everyone is here to help you in one way or another.

Sometimes we have to start small in our gratitude.  There’s no need to be grandiose about this ~ begin with I woke up this morning for that’s something we are all grateful for ~ we are happy you are here!  Then you can expand a bit, being thankful for the ability to read, to speak, to see ~ even to breathe clean air!  You can be thankful for your shelter, the heat or fans if you are in warmer weather ~ air conditioning!  Gratitude for food, the ability to taste and smell!  Perhaps you’re thankful for the electronics in your life so that you can see the world-wide connections available to you.  Do you get what I mean?

You can be thankful for the people in your life, past and present.  Each one has given you their presence as a present even if sometimes it’s harder to realize what the present was ~ but there’s always a present in that silver lining.  You just have to search a bit sometimes.

Do you see what I mean?  It just takes time, but you could list so much that you are appreciative of ~ I know I can!

I’m grateful for our connections here on the blog o’sphere!

Thanks for being here!

Shine On!