Tag Archive | healing advice

In the Middle of Every Difficulty

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“In the middle of every difficulty comes opportunity.”
~ Albert Einstein

It’s been a long few months for me.  I’ve taken on a lot of responsibility which isn’t mine to bear, but someone had to do it.  It hasn’t been easy, but it has certainly been a great opportunity for me to learn about myself.  I have learned that I can do more than I thought I could.  I have learned that I have infinite inner strength.  I have learned, I need to rely on myself.  I have learned to not take things at face value.  I have had my rose-colored glasses lifted.  I have learned to ask for help and feel gratitude when receiving it.  I have learned to let go and to allow people to do whatever they wish and not try to make it better for them.  I have learned to give myself permission let go of what I can’t control and not try to be responsible for everyone else ~ just for myself.  I have learned that I need to take off the blinders which had previously blinded me to the role that I had been given as a child and believed was my destiny.  With situations that aren’t of my doing, I have let go of the outcome and simply tried to do my best with the situation.  I continue to try to be a good person, but I am human.  I make mistakes, but those have lead me to grow in ways I couldn’t possibly have grown without the difficulties I’ve endured.

I have learned to allow others to be themselves, to act as they wish without judgement.  I have wrestled with the inability of some to help themselves, but I am learning to be with it.  I offer help, but I do not force change even when I believe that seeing a situation in a different light would be beneficial.  In short, I’ve stopped trying to do everything for everyone else and help God.  I am responsible for me.  I am responsible for my children.  I am responsible for being the best person I can be, to be helpful when needed and to remember that I can’t save others from themselves.

Big lesson for me, let me tell you.  For I was always a ‘fixer’ as my familial role given to me as a child.  Be the peace-maker.  Be the good one.  Be the responsible one ~ not that the others in my life didn’t have those traits because they did.  It was just I felt that my assigned role seemed to encumber all that and more.

But I am growing up and learning that nothing is set in stone.  That roles may change and that change can be good.  Change forces us to expand out of our comfort zones and to grow in ways that prior to now, we never even dreamed were possible.  It comes at a price for sure, but the payoff is peace within which for me, is priceless.

I am my brother’s helper but not his keeper.  Decisions that others have made in their lives are their decisions.  The decisions I’ve made in my life, are my own now.  The past role is not longer mine to own.  My responsibility rests in doing the best I can each and every day of my life and to be able to put my head on my pillow at night peacefully, knowing that I tried and hopefully I succeeded.  To help others, but to not hold onto the guilt when they choose whatever their choice is and to not judge their decisions.  It’s a handful of lessons that spill over into many forms in my life.

I hold peace within and pray for peace for others, no matter how battered their psyche.  I own the responsibility for my own actions, but not for the actions of others, nor do I try to change them.  I simply find peace within no matter the chaos around me.  I try not to engage in the swirling mindless chatter of those who aren’t well.  I limit my engagements with them, so to protect myself and my own heart.

I am a work in progress.  I am not perfect.  I will fall and get back up again and again.  I will be myself, wear my heart proudly knowing that as I love, I am loved.  I look to the positivity in my life.  I look up to the Heavens for support, guidance and the ability to find peace.  I look within myself, in the nooks and crannies of my heart for forgiveness of others and of myself.  I am learning to be free of the shackles which bound me and freedom in this moment, feels delicious.

Have the sweetest day, dear friends.

Shine On!

xo

Perfectly Imperfect

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“Perfectly Imperfect”

Below is an excerpt from Steve Maraboli’s book entitled ‘Life, the Truth, and Being Free’ which I recently found which has helped me to understand the life changes I am enduring.  Although I haven’t read the book, I found this tidbit to be comforting in my journey.  Perhaps you will find a nugget of understanding here too.

Shine On!

xo

 We have all heard that no two snowflakes are alike. Each snowflake takes the perfect form for the maximum efficiency and effectiveness for its journey. And while the universal force of gravity gives them a shared destination, the expansive space in the air gives each snowflake the opportunity to take their own path. They are on the same journey, but each takes a different path.
Along this gravity-driven journey, some snowflakes collide and damage each other, some collide and join together, some are influenced by wind… there are so many transitions and changes that take place along the journey of the snowflake. But, no matter what the transition, the snowflake always finds itself perfectly shaped for its journey.
I find parallels in nature to be a beautiful reflection of grand orchestration. One of these parallels is of snowflakes and us. We, too, are all headed in the same direction. We are being driven by a universal force to the same destination. We are all individuals taking different journeys and along our journey, we sometimes bump into each other, we cross paths, we become altered… we take different physical forms. But at all times we too are 100% perfectly imperfect. At every given moment we are absolutely perfect for what is required for our journey. I’m not perfect for your journey and you’re not perfect for my journey, but I’m perfect for my journey and you’re perfect for your journey. We’re heading to the same place, we’re taking different routes, but we’re both exactly perfect the way we are.
Think of what understanding this great orchestration could mean for relationships. Imagine interacting with others knowing that they too each share this parallel with the snowflake. Like you, they are headed to the same place and no matter what they may appear like to you, they have taken the perfect form for their journey. How strong our relationships would be if we could see and respect that we are all perfectly imperfect for our journey.”

~ Steve Maraboli from Life, the Truth, and Being Free