Tag Archive | gift

Come Join the Celebration!

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Congratulations!

February 1st, 2002 was the date that I had my bilateral mastectomy due to my breast cancer diagnosis and the pathology report which read that after my lumpectomy, I still had breast cancer in my body.  It’s also the date that marks the fact that I finally took hold of my own health and my life and decided to prophylactically take the non-cancerous breast as well, much to my surgeon’s chagrin.  I can happily report to you, that I still stand by my decision as it was the right one for me.

There is so much I have learned in the last 11 years since that day that I walked into the OR by myself, sobbing after being taken away from hugging my supportive husband who still stands by my side.  In the wake of having had those breasts reconstructed with silicone implants twice since then and then after having one of those implants rupture last year, beginning multiple surgeries to create what I now have for breasts which is body tissue taken from other parts of my body to make new, real, soft fleshy breasts which are mine and not artificial, hard, painful implants which I had endured because I had no choice, I am celebrating!

Since my breast cancer diagnosis on New Year’s Eve of 2001, my life has changed so dramatically that words fail me in trying to explain how richer my life has become.  I have endured much suffering, but I have also reaped many blessings.  I am grateful for each and every day when I arise from my bed to greet the world.  I am thankful for life’s blessings, the big and small ones and I know firsthand the meaning of the preciousness of time.  I practice being present in my life ~ enjoying The Presents of Presence ~ meaning actually being in the moment and enjoying what that moment offers.  My intent to cast worry from my shoulders is an ongoing trial in my life, but I accept that it is a work in progress.

I know I am blessed with a loving family and much support in my life and I rejoice in the fact that I can continue to send out love on a daily basis through my blog, my FB page The Presents of Presence, my SendOutCards business and my actions.   I have struggled through the grief of losing my breasts, fighting the disease through multiple surgeries (more than 10 and counting), ACT (chemotherapy), radiation, the loss of my ovaries at age 35 (salpingo oophorectomy), multiple needles, shots, medications, tamoxifen, arimidex,  the loss of my hair, my self-esteem, my confidence as a woman, the sad passing of friends from the same disease and the mortal fear of reoccurrence.  This is not a pity party by any means, so please don’t mis-understand me.  It’s actually a celebration of triumph!

My mother-in-law texted me this morning, “Have an especially happy day!” and I knew exactly what she meant for I knew that she remembered ~ and I knew that she would be there with me celebrating this momentous event.  I’m still here!  I have no painful implants anymore!  I have come full circle today ~ from having my God-given breasts, to having them removed due to dis-ease, to having them reconstructed not once, but twice with implants, to having been miraculously restored and reconstructed with breasts again which are of my own flesh and blood.

I am not sure that if you haven’t experienced this phenomenon that you can imagine how incredible it is to be here 11 years later celebrating so many wonderful gifts that my life has brought to me.  It is with heartfelt tears of joy, of gratitude and of above all, love that I write to you today.  However, knowing that we all carry burdens while we endure our journey on this earth, I feel like this is OUR CELEBRATION TODAY!  So please indulge me as I invite you to celebrate love and life on the first of February (don’t forget to say Rabbit Rabbit)  as well as family, friends, miracles, faith, joy, laughter, tears, gratitude, blessings, health, compassion, friendship…I could go on and on!

Celebrate Today my friends…Yesterday is the past, tomorrow is the future…

Today is a gift, that’s why we call it the Present!

May The Presents of Presence

Be with You Every Day!

Shine On!

xo

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Free Chopra Creating Abundance and Musings from Misifusa

Register for Chopra 21 Day Meditation Challenge

Day 1 ~ “Today, I behold all the abundance that surrounds me.”
Day 2 ~ “I create my personal abundance from an infinite source.”
With Hurricane Sandy having blown through my life, 3 surgeries thus far and another coming up in December, plus my Dad’s passing and being responsible for closing out an almost 50 year law practice by myself…I’ve been a bit overwhelmed these days…and now there’s a Nor’Easter (another bad storm) on its way, ready to hit tomorrow.  UGH!  Double UGH!
So I am giving myself a pass today because I didn’t send this particular post out last week when I had planned to do it.  Without power, there wasn’t much I could do about it!  Perhaps there’s a reason for it…at least that’s the thought that I’m comforting myself with right now.
All is quiet in my home this morning.  I awoke with a migraine (darn weather changes) and still, I wanted to use the stillness and freshness of the morning to enjoy the meditations that Deepak Chopra has so generously given to all.  Today is Day 2 so I was behind already, but I am happy to report that I am all caught up.  Like one of my sons in school, I feel that relief that my homework is done for the day and I can move on.
But something interesting happened today when I did the 2 meditations.  I realized how stressed I am these days, how I’ve allowed my body to be encased in a hard pressured stressed feeling that is so tightly bound inside of me that I didn’t even realize that it existed.  It had become my normal after so much stress in my life.  And I can assure you, I am stressed with all of the responsibilities which have fallen onto my shoulders.  I am in charge of everything and everyone right now ~ dealing with a body which is enduring more than its share of surgeries and traumas.  I just keep pushing through to the next event, the next task and I’m not taking care of me.  I’m too wrapped up in what has to be done, wishing I could skirt some of the mess and just be taken care of instead of taking care of it all.
There’s food to be bought because of the power outage for 6 days, we lost everything in the refrigerators/freezers.  With the looming storm, I need to make sure that I replenish (but not too much) supplies.  Then there’s the fact that Mom hasn’t been to her house in a week so I need to drive her there to make sure that things are ok, plus I believe she wants some new clothes having only packed for a few days.  Boys still don’t have school and there’s the added burden of how to drive about 45 minutes away when there are still trees down, power out and gas rationing going on (which today’s not my day to fill up so I have to be careful).
I could go on and on and rehash all that is on my plate these days, but instead, I’ll leave you with what I learned.  I am planting the seeds of abundance in my life through Deepak’s meditations.  I am determined to unleash the synchronicity of blessings which are infinite and given to all.
I am blessed I know…but I am tired.  I long to rest, to quit worrying and to just ‘be’ at peace.  Perhaps with the start of the morning meditations, I can accomplish my goal.  I am handing it all over to God/Universe/Infinite Spirit…I am letting go of my control and just allowing life to be.
Hugs to all of you…
Enjoy Deepak’s gift!
xo