Tag Archive | compassion

Are You Divergent?

divergent

“Becoming fearless isn’t the point.
That’s impossible.
It’s learning
how to control your fear,
and how to be free from it.”
― Veronica Roth, Divergent

Have you read the book or seen the movie?   I had never heard of it until my sister-in-law told me that she and her daughter had watched it after reading the book.  So, when it came on TV one night, I popped some popcorn and snuggled on the couch to watch.  I am so glad that I did.

I will not give away the story, but I will tell you that the lessons learned in the movie about fear are amazing, thought-provoking and interesting.  The belief that we are suited to a type of work, pigeon-holing ourselves by one major human virtue is a challenge for those who fit into more than one and therefore are called divergentDivergents are believed to be dangerous by the simple fact that they have more than one equally prominent virtue.

Bravery ~ Selflessness ~ Intelligence ~ Honesty ~ Kindness/Compassion

So which one of the virtues above would you pick if you had to be only one?  Or would you be considered divergent?  Have you ever felt out of place and divergent?  What did you do?  How did/do you handle it?  Please share below as I would love to hear your story.

Shine On!

xo

 

Please Hear What I’m Not Saying…

Please Hear What I’m Not Saying

This poem was sent to me by a friend and it struck such a chord with me that I knew I had to share it with you. ♥  Does it remind you of anyone?

Don’t be fooled by me.
Don’t be fooled by the face I wear
for I wear a mask, a thousand masks,
masks that I’m afraid to take off,
and none of them is me.

Pretending is an art that’s second nature with me,
but don’t be fooled,
for God’s sake don’t be fooled.
I give you the impression that I’m secure,
that all is sunny and unruffled with me, within as well as without,
that confidence is my name and coolness my game,
that the water’s calm and I’m in command
and that I need no one,
but don’t believe me.
My surface may seem smooth but my surface is my mask,
ever-varying and ever-concealing.
Beneath lies no complacence.
Beneath lies confusion, and fear, and aloneness.
But I hide this. I don’t want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weakness exposed.
That’s why I frantically create a mask to hide behind,
a nonchalant sophisticated facade,
to help me pretend,
to shield me from the glance that knows.

But such a glance is precisely my salvation, my only hope,
and I know it.
That is, if it’s followed by acceptance,
if it’s followed by love.
It’s the only thing that can liberate me from myself,
from my own self-built prison walls,
from the barriers I so painstakingly erect.
It’s the only thing that will assure me
of what I can’t assure myself,
that I’m really worth something.
But I don’t tell you this. I don’t dare to, I’m afraid to.
I’m afraid your glance will not be followed by acceptance,
will not be followed by love.
I’m afraid you’ll think less of me,
that you’ll laugh, and your laugh would kill me.
I’m afraid that deep-down I’m nothing
and that you will see this and reject me.

So I play my game, my desperate pretending game,
with a facade of assurance without
and a trembling child within.
So begins the glittering but empty parade of masks,
and my life becomes a front.
I idly chatter to you in the suave tones of surface talk.
I tell you everything that’s really nothing,
and nothing of what’s everything,
of what’s crying within me.
So when I’m going through my routine
do not be fooled by what I’m saying.
Please listen carefully and try to hear what I’m not saying,
what I’d like to be able to say,
what for survival I need to say,
but what I can’t say.

I don’t like hiding.
I don’t like playing superficial phony games.
I want to stop playing them.
I want to be genuine and spontaneous and me
but you’ve got to help me.
You’ve got to hold out your hand
even when that’s the last thing I seem to want.
Only you can wipe away from my eyes
the blank stare of the breathing dead.
Only you can call me into aliveness.
Each time you’re kind, and gentle, and encouraging,
each time you try to understand because you really care,
my heart begins to grow wings–
very small wings,
very feeble wings,
but wings!

With your power to touch me into feeling
you can breathe life into me.
I want you to know that.
I want you to know how important you are to me,
how you can be a creator–an honest-to-God creator–
of the person that is me
if you choose to.
You alone can break down the wall behind which I tremble,
you alone can remove my mask,
you alone can release me from my shadow-world of panic,
from my lonely prison,
if you choose to.
Please choose to.

Do not pass me by.
It will not be easy for you.
A long conviction of worthlessness builds strong walls.
The nearer you approach to me the blinder I may strike back.
It’s irrational, but despite what the books say about man
often I am irrational.
I fight against the very thing I cry out for.
But I am told that love is stronger than strong walls
and in this lies my hope.
Please try to beat down those walls
with firm hands but with gentle hands
for a child is very sensitive.

Who am I, you may wonder?
I am someone you know very well.
For I am every man you meet
and I am every woman you meet.

~ Charles C. Finn
September 1966

Shine On!

xo

You can read a collection of stories about the poem’s impact in Please Hear What I’m Not Saying: a Poem’s Reach around the World

Hope in the New Year

hope

The sun rose on a new year, and my heart was filled with such hope.

Welcome 2015!  I lay to rest 2014 with a heavy heart.  I awaken with enthusiasm for the beauty, hope and love that a new year and a new chapter bring to my heart.

I do not believe in resolutions for they are too restrictive to me.  Instead, last year I chose a power word which coincidentally was LOVE ~ and I learned much about LOVE last year.  I have thought much about what my theme would be this year, trying out all new words in order to choose what I feel is right for my new life.

TAPESTRY:  To weave through my radiant days with loving joy the following attributes

Love

Empowerment

Health

Wealth

Happiness

Service

Hope

Kindness

Compassion

Gratitude

Faith

*Not necessarily in this order…

May 2015 be your year of wishes fulfilled with plenty of love, laughter, gratitude, health, wealth, hope and happiness.

Shine On!

xo

 

Come Join the Celebration!

69145841_

Congratulations!

February 1st, 2002 was the date that I had my bilateral mastectomy due to my breast cancer diagnosis and the pathology report which read that after my lumpectomy, I still had breast cancer in my body.  It’s also the date that marks the fact that I finally took hold of my own health and my life and decided to prophylactically take the non-cancerous breast as well, much to my surgeon’s chagrin.  I can happily report to you, that I still stand by my decision as it was the right one for me.

There is so much I have learned in the last 11 years since that day that I walked into the OR by myself, sobbing after being taken away from hugging my supportive husband who still stands by my side.  In the wake of having had those breasts reconstructed with silicone implants twice since then and then after having one of those implants rupture last year, beginning multiple surgeries to create what I now have for breasts which is body tissue taken from other parts of my body to make new, real, soft fleshy breasts which are mine and not artificial, hard, painful implants which I had endured because I had no choice, I am celebrating!

Since my breast cancer diagnosis on New Year’s Eve of 2001, my life has changed so dramatically that words fail me in trying to explain how richer my life has become.  I have endured much suffering, but I have also reaped many blessings.  I am grateful for each and every day when I arise from my bed to greet the world.  I am thankful for life’s blessings, the big and small ones and I know firsthand the meaning of the preciousness of time.  I practice being present in my life ~ enjoying The Presents of Presence ~ meaning actually being in the moment and enjoying what that moment offers.  My intent to cast worry from my shoulders is an ongoing trial in my life, but I accept that it is a work in progress.

I know I am blessed with a loving family and much support in my life and I rejoice in the fact that I can continue to send out love on a daily basis through my blog, my FB page The Presents of Presence, my SendOutCards business and my actions.   I have struggled through the grief of losing my breasts, fighting the disease through multiple surgeries (more than 10 and counting), ACT (chemotherapy), radiation, the loss of my ovaries at age 35 (salpingo oophorectomy), multiple needles, shots, medications, tamoxifen, arimidex,  the loss of my hair, my self-esteem, my confidence as a woman, the sad passing of friends from the same disease and the mortal fear of reoccurrence.  This is not a pity party by any means, so please don’t mis-understand me.  It’s actually a celebration of triumph!

My mother-in-law texted me this morning, “Have an especially happy day!” and I knew exactly what she meant for I knew that she remembered ~ and I knew that she would be there with me celebrating this momentous event.  I’m still here!  I have no painful implants anymore!  I have come full circle today ~ from having my God-given breasts, to having them removed due to dis-ease, to having them reconstructed not once, but twice with implants, to having been miraculously restored and reconstructed with breasts again which are of my own flesh and blood.

I am not sure that if you haven’t experienced this phenomenon that you can imagine how incredible it is to be here 11 years later celebrating so many wonderful gifts that my life has brought to me.  It is with heartfelt tears of joy, of gratitude and of above all, love that I write to you today.  However, knowing that we all carry burdens while we endure our journey on this earth, I feel like this is OUR CELEBRATION TODAY!  So please indulge me as I invite you to celebrate love and life on the first of February (don’t forget to say Rabbit Rabbit)  as well as family, friends, miracles, faith, joy, laughter, tears, gratitude, blessings, health, compassion, friendship…I could go on and on!

Celebrate Today my friends…Yesterday is the past, tomorrow is the future…

Today is a gift, that’s why we call it the Present!

May The Presents of Presence

Be with You Every Day!

Shine On!

xo

Love is in the Air…

68566801_

Love is in the air…

While I was in the grocery store, I happened down the card aisle as I love cards and saw the sea of pinks and reds!  Ahhh…Valentine’s Day is coming ~ which of course, brought a huge smile to my face because I love sending out love and this is the holiday for just that!

How do you feel about Valentine’s Day?  Is it the holiday that you love (pun intended!) or is the one that you’d rather skip for personal reasons?  Do you feel it’s a lovers only occasion or are you like me and think that it’s the perfect time to send out love to everyone that you care for in your life?  You see, I’ve always been the type of person who wants you to know how much I love you because I never want any regrets.  In fact, I make sure when my boys leave everyday for school and my hubby goes off to work, that I kiss them all goodbye and tell them that I love them.  I just can’t help it ~ it’s just the way I’m wired!

I’ve told you how I’ve reached out with my cards to others and how I’ve said what I wanted to say without worries of silence on the other end of the phone ~ I’ve reconnected with family click here to read   with whom I’d grown apart through my cards and healed relationships…and hopefully I’ve made others’ days with a surprise card in the mail amidst the bills and junk mail.  You know how that feels don’t you?  That happy surprised feeling when you see that envelope in the mailbox ~ it’s the one you open first because you want to know what it says ~ it’s a priceless feeling which is why I send a card everyday!  I want everyone to get that special smile on their face!

How about you?  What keeps you back from sending cards?  Don’t know what to say?  Hate spending $5 or more for a card which doesn’t say what you want?  Do you find that you buy a card but never send it because you can’t find a stamp or the right address?  Or is it that you can’t find a card that you like?  Do you speak French, Portuguese, German, Italian or Spanish and want to write in your language but find that it’s difficult to find cards?

I have the perfect solution for you ~ you can now send a card from anywhere in the world to anywhere in the world!  You can send a card from your iPhone or android phone or you can send it from your computer ~ all you need is wifi which means you can be on the beach or out at the soccer fields and send a card!  We have over 16,000 cards in our card catalog or you can design you own in less than 10 minutes.  You can use what is written inside the card and/or add your own sentiment in your own language!  You can write in your own handwriting font or choose from our many different ones!  You can sign your name in your own handwriting as well!  You can add as many pictures to your card as you’d like and even attach a video via a QR code to make your card interactive!  There’s an online address book which also works as a personal assistant reminding you of upcoming special birthdays as well!

In 10 minutes, you can find a card, write your heartfelt message, even add a gift, gift card or even Mrs. Field’s cookies, click SEND and viola!  Your card is sent whenever you wish ~ you can schedule your card and gift to be sent up to a year in advance!

And the best part is that your card, even with all the pictures you’d like to put in it and even a video if you wish would never cost you more than $2 plus postage which is .46!  And yet, your recipient gets a real card in the mail and not an e-card from you!

Just click here!  The account is free and you only pay for the cards you want to send!  Who needs to hear from you this Valentine’s Day?  What are you waiting for?  Just try it ~

You have nothing to lose, but LOVE to gain!

What is we all sent love out everyday…imagine what a wonderful world this would be!

Love is in the air…enjoy the video below…perhaps you remember the song?  

Shine On!

xo