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Death Is A Mind Experience

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Death comes in many forms.  Death as in the physical body dying.  Death as in the mind dying, which leads to the physical death.  Death as in relationships which disconnects us from loved ones.  Death as in the motivation to live.

The mind/body experience is exponentially important.  Don’t you think?

When our minds become closed, we suffer.  We allow negativity to grow and instead of outsourcing our needs, we may become sullen and distant.  Life experiences can hamper our thinking and we can easily get mired into closed-mindedness when we aren’t aware of how our thoughts are slowly killing us.  When we don’t open up to someone else, we shut the box on possibility and the noose around our thoughts and actions tightens.

It sad to see people who become so embroiled in that battle within their minds.  It’s frustrating to others who witness the demise of personality, only to be helplessly waiting on the sidelines for an opportunity to offer help.  Rebuffed when the offering stands out there, is hard for the one whose mind has closed and for the one who is gently trying to pry the box or door open just a little.

Too much focus on one aspect of life can be detrimental.  Being all-encompassing with grief or fear or hurt or even shame can lock up the mind permanently.

The mind is a muscle that we must exercise.  Like body muscles which when you are working out, must be given different tasks to build different muscles so that we aren’t lopsided after strength training, the mind requires the same.  Left and right hemispheres need thought exercises as well.  To live in only one hemisphere can be detrimental as well as self-sabotaging to our well-being.  We need to balance our brain hemispheres.

Many of us are innately more right brain or left brain thinkers.  We speak, act and make decisions from where we think.  But to enrich our life journey we need to tap into the other side of the brain too.  By doing this, we expand the tapestry of our thinking, of our life experience and make our life richer and fuller.  We live more and we continue growth and expansion which is the opposite of death.

It’s like when you try to clap – do it now.  How are you hands placed?  Now do the opposite hand placement and clap again.  Doesn’t it feel strange?  The groove of routine is cemented that we clap a certain way, but when we try to change it up, it even sounds different.  Did you notice?

Thinking and using the other side of the brain can feel like clapping with the opposite hand.  A little awkward, may feel differently and thoughts may sound odd to you, but it’s still thinking (and clapping).  If you can find it an interesting experiment, take some time to figure out what is the predominate brain side for you.  Then read about it and understand yourself a bit more.  Now read about the opposite side and see if you can tap into that hemisphere for a few minutes today.  Let yourself experience the full capacity of your amazing brain everyday.

Set your brain free and live!

Shine On!

xo

P.S.  I’m not quite sure why or how I wrote this post as it makes little sense to me.  But if it does to you, please let me know. ♥

 

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Sandwich Generation

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Have you ever heard of the sandwich generation?  It’s when you are a parent who takes care of your own children and your own parents at the same time.  Sandwiched in between the generations and responsible for them all at the same time.  At least, that’s my attempt at its definition.

I should know…I’ve been doing it for awhile now.

I have friends who are beginning the journey of helping their elderly parents and it’s hard.  Hard for the parents to let go and to allow their children to help them and hard for all to realize that life is imminently shorter than we plan for when we are young.  The changes that occur as our parents get older are sometimes unimaginable and hard for them and for us to fathom and navigate.  I mean, what parent ever wants to give up control to their children?  We are the parents after all. (said in the parental authoritative voice!)

But it happens.  If we’re lucky to still have our parents and our children be able to have a relationship (and if we still have a good relationship with our parents as well), please remember to feel blessed.  Because sometimes as the years go on, family difficulties interfere and our relationships deteriorate.

But in a perfect world, we may be blessed to take care of our parents as they took care of us.  This goes for anyone really in the older generations, the aunts and uncles, the older cousins, etc.

So can I give you a little advice especially now that Thanksgiving and the holiday season are arriving?

  1. Do your best to include them.  Make the effort to go get them to bring them to the family get togethers if they are close enough.
  2. Make them feel important.
  3. Watch to see how they are doing physically, mentally and emotionally.
  4. You are now the caretaker so be aware of subtle changes and if you see some, gently approach the subject.
  5. Get Mom’s favorite recipes now while she remembers them.
  6. Take pictures!  I can’t stress this enough!  Get photos of the family together.
  7. Video tape them telling stories or singing or whatever memory you want to keep.  Someday you may wish you could hear their voices again or remember how they sang their favorite song or danced the watusi!
  8. Be patient.  Getting older is not for sissies and they are doing the best they can.
  9. Role model kindness because your children they will remember how you treated your family.
  10. Be affectionate with them if that’s your family style.  There’s nothing better than taking that extra moment to hug a parent or family member.  They will appreciate it as will you.
  11. Tell them how much you care and love them.  During Thanksgiving you can give thanks to them for all that they did for you.
  12. Include them in favorite memories that showcase their love.
  13. Be aware that as we get older, it gets harder to remember, to move and to hear other people.
  14. Take the precious time to talk with them and to ask and to listen attentively to whatever they have to say.
  15. Try not to put them in the corner and out of the way if they don’t want that because keeping them actively involved helps them immensely.
  16. Be kinder as you won’t ever regret it later.
  17. Take it all in stride and be patient with yourself as well.
  18. Smile and know in your heart you are doing a great job.
  19. Count your blessings that they are still here to spend time with you.
  20. Enjoy each and every moment for life goes by in a flash!

I wish you all a wonderful holiday season!  I am thankful for my Mom and for those in the older generations of our family.  Having loved ones pass away in the last few years has been hard and I pray that you will keep in mind that every moment spent together is precious.

Shine On!

xo

 

Join Me and Salute The Veterans

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The military has always been a small part of my life.  My Dad was a Navy man.  He and my Mom met at an Army/Navy game.  All three of my Mom’s brothers served as U.S. Marines and one in the Army.  Multiple cousins and extended family have served in the military as well.  I have friends who are veterans and others who are in active duty.  Now the next generation has arrived and I pray for the friends of my sons who have chosen to be a part of the military branches.  I now have ties to Air Force Rangers, Navy Seals, Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines and Coast Guard.

I remember wearing a POW (Prisoner of War) bracelet as a young girl.  I asked my Dad for one as he wore one and had explained to me why he wore his.  I wanted to show my support for the man who was missing and his family.  I still have it somewhere and now that I’m older, I need to find out if he was ever found.

Today I salute all those who are a part of our military and their families.  From my heart, I thank you for your service and I don’t take lightly what you have sacrificed for all of us.  The unimaginable atrocities that you have witnessed and experienced sadden me.  I can’t begin to imagine the unfathomable knowledge that you may keep inside and yet you are still here.  I admire your unbreakable spirit and commitment.  I know that what you have gone through may have changed you in ways we civilians cannot even begin to understand.  I have witnessed how the human spirit can be broken irrevocably and my heart goes out to you.

Years ago, I attended many military functions due to invites via work.  I met so many amazing men and women who were in the military and I was always honored when they shared their stories with me.  I never forgot to thank them for their service to our country.  Their calling to be a part of the military was evident and even though I have never felt that calling, I admire their willingness to be a part of it, to proudly stand for what they believe in and to sacrifice themselves for our country’s freedom.

In my heart, mind and soul, I wish we had no need for militia and that peace would reign throughout our planet Earth.  But that doesn’t seem possible in my lifetime, nor in the lifetime of my children unless we all commit to unconditional love prevailing.  Oh what a miracle that would be, don’t you think?

Today, please take a moment to say a prayer for all of the Veterans, those in active duty and those who have lost lives and spirits.  We appreciate you and your families.  We honor your commitments and we hold you tenderly in our hearts.  May God Bless Us All.

Shine On!

xo

Watching Glass Shatter

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Watching Glass Shatter

By James J. Cudney

Recently, I connected with a newly published author who’s also an incredible blogger.  Jay, as he’s known to friends, is a great connector as you’ll find on his blog This Is My Truth Now.

Jay writes about so much that it’s impossible for me to put him in a neatly boxed description so you’ll just have to trust me on this one and go over to visit him.  You won’t be disappointed.  He has a plethora of subjects from his favorite dog Ryder who debuts on Mondays (for all you dog lovers) to his numerous book reviews which I can’t imagine how he reads so much, but he does!  Then, there’s his delightful sense of humor and banter with his blogging pals.  It’s almost like dancing, when you ‘talk’ with him.  You know, that give and take as you move through the blogosphere?   As those who fish say, he’s a keeper and I’m glad to share his blog and book with you today!

Let me start by telling you that Watching Glass Shatter reviews can be found here for Good Reads.  You can also find them here on Amazon! Oh, and here’s the link to buy it here!  For old school readers, the paperback book itself is now available too on the same link!

When I recount that it’s Jay’s fault that I had a sleepless night and an unproductive next day, I mean it.  I usually read a little on my kindle before bedtime, so I started his book as I usually do, thinking I’d read a chapter or two.  Honestly, I picked it up because he’s a fellow blogger and I’m loyal like that – and the subject of family interests me.  I was smitten by reading the description of the book so I thought, what the heck!  What I didn’t expect was the depth to which his characters touched me, each with their own individualized perceptions and feelings to round out the formation of a family in every sense of the word.  If you’re a part of a family, you know there are nuances between members, subtle and yet sometimes stark reminders of a shared past.  Delve into the family unit long enough and you’ll find all sorts of relationships, beliefs and hidden secrets.

Jay’s book makes no exception as he invites us into the Glass family with open arms.  Beautifully written, detailed and believable, we journey with them through the death of their patriarch father Ben and experience the aftermath of Glass shattering.

This is why I couldn’t put his book down until I finished it.  Pulling my heartstrings with each character, Jay kept me reading until the very wee hours of the morning.  When I was finished, I fell asleep sated with the love and connections of a family I just met.

Please join me in welcoming  James J. Cudney to the realm of newly published author.  This is a book you won’t want to miss!  Be sure to pop over to his blog too and tell him Misifusa sent you!

Here’s the tour schedule if you want to follow it!  Join the community of bloggers who are supporting Jay and his book tour!

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And if you feel inclined, please stop by GoodReads or Amazon to write a book review for him after you’ve read it.  Thank you!  I always love to support other bloggers and I know you do too!

Shine On!

xo

 

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Animal Round Up For Halloween

Happy Halloween to you!  In honor of the holiday, I thought I’d take a few photos of the critters I’ve seen recently at the house.

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BIG SPIDER – at my front door.  Glad he didn’t knock!

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Cricket on the back patio during the day. I thought they only came out at night?

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Dead Katydid at the back door

 

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Sadly, dead moth who was feeding the ants as goes the circle of life.

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Mr. Squirrel posing

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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But the best part? The deer who were just standing outside the barn after my last lesson. Sorry for the grainy photo, it was dark out!

 

I have missed seeing the deer in my new house.  At my old one, I would see them passing by at twilight across my neighbor’s front lawn.  But when I recently left a horseback riding lesson, while walking to my car, I thought a big dog was scampering past me.  When my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I saw an entire family of deer a few yards away from me.  How glorious for me!  As I quietly talked with them, they stood there listening intently.  It was such a precious moment!  They even patiently waited while I grabbed my phone and took a few photos.  This was the best photo of the group I got, although I’m sorry it’s so grainy.  It was dark out, but I could see them and their eyes twinkling in the night.

I love deer.  I’ve written about them before in my blog.  I love all animals, even little Mr. Mousey who hopefully lives outside only.  You know, I have two cats in my home whom I adore.  Hopefully one day, I will even get a big dog, but that will have to wait for now.  Maybe I won’t be able to get a dog, but perhaps someone will share theirs with me so that we can play fetch and romp with enthusiasm outside.

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Happy Halloween from Tiffy the American Bobtail and her favorite Witch!

There’s something about animals that I adore.  Sometimes, I think they are better than humans for they are more honest and loyal.  The older I’ve gotten, the more attuned I seem to be getting with animals, especially wildlife.  I wonder if it’s the Pisces in me?

I hope you have a lovely day.

Shine On!

xo

Do You Know About Cempasúchil?

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Today’s prompt immediately made my mind go to the beautiful orange marigolds which are so popular around this time, especially in Mexico.  Cempasúchil as they are called are used in the Day of the Dead decorations.

Do you want to know more?

See The Legend of the Cempasúchil Flower

Have the most delightful Friday!  Here comes the weekend!

Shine On!

xo

Make Time For People

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Sometimes we need to drop everything and pay attention to the people around us.  Cleaning can be done at any time, but people, when in need, need us now, not when it’s more convenient.  Have you ever had a friend just call to chat because they needed a kind listener, but you’ve got plans to fix up your home, clean out your closets or such and you’re torn between getting done what’s on your list or connecting with them?

You know what the heartfelt decision is, right?

People first.

Did I even need to tell you that?  Or did you already innately know the answer? 

I think we get so caught up in our lives that we don’t make time for those who may need us, but don’t want to bother anyone with their feelings of sadness.  That tentative, I’m just calling to say hi, can sometimes be a disguise to a more needy version of help me, I’m falling apart.  It is with discretion that we need to answer those types of calls because we never know what someone else is going through in their lives.

Sadness can be masked in so many different ways.  Superwomen/Supermen that we are, we don’t share when times get tough for fear of gossip or being seen as weak or worrying what someone will think when sharing our deepest secrets.  But there comes a time when we need to share with a trusted friend.

There was a saying going around on Facebook recently.  Due to a recent suicide in our community, it went like this:

My door is always open. My house is safe. Coffee can be on in minutes, and the kitchen table is a place of peace and non-judgment. Anyone who needs to chat is welcome anytime. It’s no good suffering in silence. I have food in the fridge, coffee and tea in the cabinet, and something stronger if you need it. Listening ears, and shoulders to cry on. I will always be available…you are always welcome!! This is an old value that has been lost to technology…a text, facetime, or emoji is not the equivalent! (but can still help/is better than not reaching out at all),  You are never really alone and suicide is never the answer.
please copy and re-post
#SuicideAwareness #MentalHealthAwareness
1-800-273-8255

There’s something touching with this post that I read countless times.  I just hope for heaven’s sake that people just aren’t copying/pasting and not meaning what they say.  For there are times in all of our lives when we just need a friend to lean on.

We recently had a young person pass away by suicide which rocked the community.  Love and support filled post after post which made my heart sad because I wished he had been able to get help from someone.  I know that sometimes there is not enough help for certain situations, but being me, I always hope for healing, for peace and for love.  And I know you do too.

So the next time you get an inconvenient offer for coffee or a drink or a walk, please say yes.  There are many hours in the day to get your list checked off, but you may be the much needed missing piece for healing in someone else’s day.

Shine On!

xo