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Gratitude For Eight Years On WordPress

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I got a note from WordPress today telling me that eight years ago today, I began my blog.  It doesn’t seem that I have been writing for eight years to you all, but I’m assuming WordPress knows what it’s talking about, don’t you think?  Ah, the benefits of blogging!

In eight years, much has changed in my life.  My initial focus was to help other women battling cancer, specifically breast cancer as I endured it myself and I am still here.  But as life developed, I have written about other subjects too including:  poetry, pets, children, parents, relationships, Mother Nature, horseback riding, Alzheimer’s and Dementia, holidays, angels, spirituality, religion, Rabbit, Rabbit, photography, SendOutCards, amazing books and movies, inspirational quotes, life in general and even death because I had first hand experience with all of those topics.  While I was enduring hardships, you were all there for me with your loving support and I am ever grateful.  I wrote to share my experiences in hopes that I would be able to help someone else along that path.

I am ever grateful for the loving connections that have evolved through our blogging community which we have grown through our writings and by reaching out in kindness, generosity and always with a loving heart.  Friendships have blossomed through our writings that have cemented many of us soul to soul in miraculous ways.  From WordPress comments to emails to actual phone calls, I can count many deep friendships which span the world now for which I am honored to be a part of in this lifetime – and yet, we have never met face to face.  But the love is there, without ever being in each other’s physical presence.

It’s so interesting to me that I have yet to meet anyone face to face that I met through blogging and yet I count many of you as true friends.  What a gift this Presents of Presence has been for me!  I pray that you feel the same way – that my writings, my comments and my love for all of you shines its heartlight and helps to raise the energetic vibrations of this world’s energy to encourage peace, love, compassion and understanding along with connections to all.

May your heart be lifted today and may your heartlight shine for all to see, for I see you out there dearest friends and I am ever grateful, as always, for our connections.

Shine On!

xo

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The Present

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Today’s Daily Prompt of PRESENT was a no-brainer for me to write about because hello! it’s the name of my blog!  The Presents of Presence.

It’s been a HUGE PRESENT to write to you, to make connections with you and to get to know all of you!  I love our friendships and I feel grateful and honored to know you all!

Because if we look around, precious moments are presents and they are everywhere.  But they can be fleeting when we are not paying attention.  You know what I mean?  When you turn around and wonder, what in the world did I do yesterday?  Or how did this past week fly by?

We have a limited time on this earth dear friends.  Connections can be fleeting or lifelong.  Either way, we must take each and every special opportunity to savor them.

May you have a blessed day and continue to shine your heartlights!

Shine On!

xo

Two Weeks

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Last night, I watched the movie Two Weeks with Sally Field.  While I hadn’t ever heard of the movie before now, I found out that it’s been out since 2007 on DVD as it’s one of those Indie films which I had somehow missed.

For those of us who have aging parents and relatives, this movie poignantly touched me in many ways.  The complexity of family relationships is evident here along with the reality that we all face when we pass away and when we come face to face with grief when a loved one passes away (especially a mom).

Honestly, it’s not a movie I would feel compelled to watch again as I have with others.  But I tend to watch movies about relationships and people dealing with real-life situations.  Grief seems to bring out the stark reality in relationships and this one does just that.  If you’ve endured a similar situation, this may hit too close to home.  But I think it does just that, in a good way.  It showcases the conflicted emotions that we endure when we are faced with the death of a loved one.

It was reviewed as a dramedy which I think encompasses Two Weeks well.  It’s not all laughter nor tears.  It’s the enmeshment of life’s reality.  If you’re interested in seeing more, please click on the image below and it will take you to Amazon.

Have you ever seen it?  I would love to hear from you if you have as I’d like to know what you thought of the movie.  Please let me know.

Shine On!

xo

 

 

We Are Here To Serve

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I’ve often wondered, why me? when life gets hard.  I think it’s a normal response when we feel overwhelmed by hard life experiences.  We’ve all had them, but to different extents and different types of experiences.  Dysfunctional relationships.  Cancer.  Financial problems.  Death of a loved one.  Divorce.  Alzheimer’s.  Childhood hurts.  Depression.  Family relationships gone awry.  Illness.  Just to name a few, I am sure we share some of the same hurdles, but maybe in different ways.

Life experiences teach us what we couldn’t have learned otherwise.  We can’t help others if we haven’t endured similar issues in our own lives.  What’s that quote?  Walk a mile in my shoes?  Maybe I haven’t walked in your particular shoes, but perhaps my similar experience is enough to connect with you and to help you on this life journey.

I am grateful for all that I have endured in my lifetime.  When we can see the gratitude in the hardships, we can change how we feel about them.  We increase our faith and our love quotient.  We rise above what we could have let hold us back from living a full life.

We are all here to help each other as we connect, we bond and we share our experiences.  There’s nothing better than someone else who knows what you are going through (by similar experience) who reaches out to share the experience with you as a friend, a guiding light to help you find peace within while offering a hand to hold as you heal.

The Why Me?  was answered recently by my soul who gave the response that if I hadn’t endured these experiences, I would be unable to connect so purely with others who may be in the trenches.  Without first-hand knowledge, I would only be able to sympathize and not empathize and put myself in similar shoes.  Does that make sense to you?

What I know for sure (thanks to Oprah for the phrase) is that we are here to serve one another in this lifetime.  To share experiences, to open our hearts with compassion and love and to shine our heartlights together!

You are not alone…take my hand and let’s…

Shine On!

xo

When’s Your Last Day?

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Do you think that your last day here on Earth is pre-determined?

Or do you think it’s a matter of circumstances?

Would you want to pre-know your death date (or not) if you could?

I know I may be opening up a big discussion here, but it’s a topic that has come to my attention recently through a few conversations with friends and I thought I’d ask you too.  (To my knowledge, there are no imminent deaths coming to my family/friends, so it’s just a question.)

But honestly, I think it’s a sad, but important topic to cover, to share our thoughts and to expand our thinking from others’ experiences.  Life is fragile and as my blog states, we only have the present moment for sure.  Not that I don’t plan for the future, but nobody knows for sure what’s on the horizon.  I’m not being morbid here honestly.  I don’t want to add fear to anyone’s thoughts.  I guess my point is a reiteration of being grateful for the past and being grateful for the present moment at all times.  Plan for the future, but don’t put off holding your loved ones close, spending time with them and telling them in real life, whether in person, via email, or sending a card, how you feel.

Because frankly, who doesn’t love hearing that we are appreciated and loved?

So back to the topic at hand!  What do you think of when you envision your last day?  Or do you even think about it?  I think about mine.  I think cancer changed my views on life, so I have thought about it.  I believe that we may have a pre-determined last day, but I’m open to listening to your thoughts on the subject.  For me, a pre-determined last day means I’m free to live my life without measure, completely in the moment, sharing love easily and without fear, but with the knowing that we never know our last day or that of our loved ones for sure.  With that in mind, we need to be the best, most loving souls we can be today and everyday.  It helps me to consistently choose connections, love, kindness and understanding instead of the lower vibrations.  It allows me the freedom to shine my heartlight with sparkling enthusiasm.

What about you?  If you feel inclined, please share your thoughts!

Shine On!

xo

 

A New New Year’s Eve

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I was diagnosed with breast cancer on New Year’s Eve of 2001.  I won’t bore you with the details, but if you choose to search in my posts for those key words, you will find my story.  Much has happened since that fateful day and for many years, I felt downtrodden by the reminder of my cancerversary on New Year’s Eve.

Finally, I no longer hold that diagnosis in my heart/mind/soul as I used to in the past.  The cancer diagnosis was the beginning of my spiritual journey which has led me to this day, today, for which I am ever grateful.  My life hasn’t turned out as I’d planned.  Instead, I’ve endured a plethora of losses and yet, I remain grateful for each experience.  I see now that all of those life lessons have led me to today and the spiritual knowledge which I would have never received had my life been easy and cancer-free.  I have acquired so much depth of understanding which I would have never grown if I hadn’t had to endure so much pain in my life.  The experiences reminded me of how innately strong I am and how even though my life went through periods of darkness, my heartlight shines even more brightly now because of what I’ve endured.  Isn’t that always the way?  Do you feel the same way?

My heartlight dimmed at times of great stress, disease, fear and grief, but the innate sparkle never left me.  My faith has grown stronger.  My commitment to being me in all my quirks and glory, has only increased in strength and commitment.  My supply of self-love and love for all mankind has increased exponentially.  I love from the depths of my soul and have learned to receive healthy love as well.  I no longer worry about acceptance.  I am who I am and I am not afraid anymore.

I wish you all a lovely New Year’s Eve!  Let go of who and what doesn’t serve your spiritual growth.  Leave the past hurts behind.  Enjoy The Presents of Presence and may all unfold in 2018 with love, light and peace for you!

Shine On!

xo

Enduring Breast Cancer Survivor

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This may be a controversial post, I’m just warning you.  Maybe not, depending on how you view what I feel.  I’m a breast cancer survivor although I abhor the badge survivor.  Yes, I survived breast cancer and have for almost 16 years, but I am not one of those who go to the Pinktober or Breast Cancer Walks with pink frilly enthusiasm.  It’s just not me.

I think it’s nice that people unite for those walks to raise money for research, but in the sixteen years since I was diagnosed, there have been a few strides, but not many.  So where’s the funding going?

There are thousands of items bedazzled with the pink ribbon during Breast Cancer Awareness month that are for sale.  While I appreciate it, I also feel the superficiality of it.  For enduring breast cancer isn’t all pink ribbons.

It’s grueling surgeries, treatments and fear-induced sleepless nights.  Like all life threatening situations, it requires bravery to face our inevitable death, with the threat of it coming too soon.  I was 34 years old when I was diagnosed out of the blue, having found an M&M sized lump in my breast.  Complete shock overtook me on that New Year’s Eve in 2001 when the diagnosis was delivered.

Fast forward to 2017 after having endured countless surgeries, chemotherapy (ACT) and radiation, not to mention a double mastectomy, two implant replacements and then a radical replacement of my breasts with my own fat tissue instead of implants because my body kept rejecting them, I’ve been through the ringer like many people have in my situation.  I’ve lost my hair, been in menopause since 2003 and aged faster than my friends because of the illness.  I have lingering effects from the cancer which include chronic fatigue which I battle daily.  The funny thing about the chronic fatigue is that most people just don’t understand what I experience because I look normal (or as normal as possible).  But that’s a whole different post.

However, the word survivor when applied to my breast cancer experience sticks in my craw.  Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t think I merit the word survivor.  Victims of the Holocaust merit the word survivor, people who survived horrendous experiences merit the word survivor in my book.  But for me, no.

Me, I endured breast cancer.  While its aftereffects still play a role in my daily life, I am gratefully still here.  Sure, I have had more threats to my health than I can count anymore.  I am tested routinely due to other complications and I have endured countless uncomfortable tests and more sleepless nights than I want to remember.

The term survivor to me is having lived through something awful and to be able to go on afterwards.  Maybe that’s how some people feel about their diagnosis in the breast cancer world.  For me, it’s not a been there, done that, wear the pink sparkly t-shirt and smile.  It’s still enduring the illness in whatever shape and form it reemerges.

The Presents of Presence emerged from my journey with breast cancer.  In being present with my feelings, acknowledging the gifts in this moment and in taking the time to be mindful, spiritual and experiencing all that presence allows, is how I live my life now.  I am still a work in progress.  I thank you for reading my post today, for holding my hand when needed, for your kindness and connections and for showing your heartlight as a beacon of hope for others.

Shine On!

xo