Spirits and Music

My friend JAngel and I went through chemotherapy together. We just happened to be on the same schedule and so we spent hours together, cuddled amidst blankets in lazy boy chairs, alternatively sleeping and chatting easily while the red poison of ACT (our special brand of chemotherapy) dripped into our veins for hours, killing all of the breast cancer cells which had invaded our healthy bodies. Because we also had daily shots in our bellies, many times we met as we ran into the oncology office to get our daily shots, only to wave and say see you tomorrow.

I was 34 years old…JAngel was 25 and we were the youngest there so we bonded. That was 10 years ago…and JAngel lost her battle in November ~ almost 2 years ago. She was spunky, fun and a glass 1/2 full type of gal. She didn’t let her breast cancer diagnosis (which was her second ~ having survived Hodgkin’s Lymphoma as a child) get her down.

We went to a support group together, met other women and tried to bring levity to our situations. We laughed, we cried and we helped each other. JAngel’s BC metastasized to her brain and it got harder for her to come to our group. But when she came, she brightened our room. We lost 2 of our friends and it got even harder for me to go to our group…and when JAngel passed, I stopped going altogether.

At the last minute a year ago, I went to see a medium and JAngel came through. I knew it was her when the medium told me that she was a real Jersey girl…she said she wouldn’t back down and that specifically she was to tell me that I walked for 2 now. She told me more so much that I just knew it was JAngel even though she wasn’t the reason I had gone to see the medium.

Sunday night while driving in the car, JAngel’s song came on…and the beauty of her spirit filled the car as I heard her song…funny how certain songs can bring loved ones spirits right to your heart. So I sang along with Tom Petty in her honor…

I thought you might like to belt one out for Jenn as well…so here goes…

This one’s for my Jersey Girl up in Heaven…xo

Well I know what’s right, I got just one life
in a world that keeps on pushin’ me around
but I’ll stand my ground
…and I won’t back down.