Dear Miss District of Columbia,
You don’t know me, but when I saw the article on you yesterday, I just knew I had to write to you. Please accept my deepest sympathies as I am so sad that you lost your mom, your grandmother and your great-aunt to breast cancer. My heart goes out to you for the difficult decisions you have to contemplate at the tender age of 24 in order to reduce your risk of enduring breast cancer. As an 11 year breast cancer survivor who was diagnosed at age 34, I can’t even begin to imagine how difficult this decision is for you. My heart goes out to you.
Although my story is different from yours, I wanted to share in hopes of letting you know that there are those of us who understand. My journey began with a lumpectomy. Originally I had wanted a bilateral mastectomy instead of the lumpectomy, but my surgeon denied my request, citing his philosophy to save the breasts and keep them intact. However, when the pathology results revealed there was further breast cancer invasion to the lymph nodes and outer margins, I was scheduled for a second surgery which was to remove only the cancerous breast. And that’s when I started listening to myself ~ just like you are doing now!
I called my surgeon back and scheduled a double mastectomy even though nobody agreed with me, least of all my surgeon. But I know me, and as I began listening to me, I knew in my heart that it was ME who was going to inhabit my body, day in and night out and it was my comfort level which had to have first priority. There were shady calcifications in the other breast which to me, would eventually lead to breast cancer again, so I wanted that out of the equation in my life!
It’s been a rocky road for me with the reconstructions, but I have never once regretted my decision to take both of my breasts and I can happily tell you that I feel that I am here because I really listened to myself. I think our bodies know what we need to do and it is just a matter of our listening to our own bodies which helps to heal and not hinder our lives.
I am very proud of you for listening to yourself and to your body and for having the courage to stand up and speak about it. Please don’t let anyone else’s opinion sway you because it is YOU who has to live in your body everyday and it will be your healing or your fight in the end and nobody else’s. It is not easy to live without your breasts and it is a painful decision to make ~ however, I stand firmly beside you ~ for it is YOUR rightful decision to make and no one else’s. Surely your mom, your grandmother and your great aunt proudly applaud your courage as do the rest of us.
I love your quote, ““I’ve been thinking how powerful that might be to have a Miss America say, ‘I might be Miss America but I’m still going to have surgery. I’m going to take control of my own life, my own health care,’ ” she said. “So I guess it’s up to what happens on Saturday night.”
May you continue to be a shining example of light, of hope and of taking control of your own life,
your own healthcare to the millions of women and men in the world!
Shine On Miss District of Columbia!
Long May You Reign!
xo
What courage and power — both of you.
Thank you for sharing this. I am in awe.
Have you seen the Scar Project? http://www.thescarproject.org/ Stunning and inspiring.
Thank you Louise! Yes, the Scar Project is enlightening, isn’t it? Thanks so much for sharing the website as well! Hugs to you.
Very inspiring- thank you for sharing this!
Thank you for reading and commenting! xo
Where did all your courage come from? You have such a strong sense of yourself and yet you always think of others. You are an inspiration and a role model!
Oh Rosebud dear, you are so kind…I am blessed to know you…thank you for your sweet comments. xo
What an inspirational post and a fabulous message – have the courage to listen to your body and yourself. Thank you!
Thank you Carolyn ~ I think it’s the most important lesson we can learn to do ~ to listen and love ourselves so that we can do the same for others. Thank you for your sweet comment!
Wow, what great role models you both are! Thank you!
Thank you! xo
What a beautiful gift you’ve given with your letter. It is so essential that we listen to our bodies and our hearts for guidance with these decisions. Your clarity and strength will surely be an inspiration to her. Knowing we are not alone is so helpful. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for reading, commenting and understanding. I think the most important part is that we realize that we are all connected and we are not alone in this journey of life. Hugs
You are wise. We do need to listen to ourselves and act. I admire your courage even though I cringe at what you had to go through. Most of my scars are on my face, but yours are so much harder to take, I think. Lots of love to you. Thanks for sharing this with the world. You are a special person!!!
Marsha, you are so kind and I am so glad we’ve connected. I think you are a special person as well. I’m sorry you have facial scars…I think you are beautiful both inside and out. Hugs to you! xo
Thanks. Life could be a lot worse. Most people have scars somewhere. My mom taught kindergarten for years. One of the most favorite sharing events were when the kids received a new scar. Scars can be cool. They are a sign that life happens! They distinguish us from other people. Wouldn’t it be awful if everyone looked alike – no matter how beautiful they are. There is a Twilight Zone about that. When the kids turned 19 they got to choose one of about 4 models of beautiful humans they could be. They went through surgery, then had to all wear name tags because they all looked alike. Marsha